The Simpsons 381-385

Please Homer, Don't Hammer 'Em

This episode premiered on September 24th, 2006. The lead in show was the NFL Post Game Show and it was followed by American Dad. It ran opposite Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, The Amazing Race and Football Night In America.

The title of the episode comes from the 1990 album Please Hammer, Don't Hurt 'Em by MC Hammer

The couch gag is Ralph runs into the living room where a vending machine is set up, he puts in his change and gets a Homer figure, and bites its head off. 

The family heads to the Springfield Mall but it's pretty run down, the L at the end of the name is barley hanging on. Homer buys a set of do it yourself books. Meanwhile someone at school has a peanut allergy so they are banned from school, when Marge checks Bart's lunchbox she finds a peanut butter sandwich, trail mix with peanuts and a copy of Good Grief, More Peanuts by Charles Shultz (a real book btw). Marge gets mad at Homer for not actually using the fix it book however when she steps on a loose floorboard and breaks the nightstand she gets out the books and figures out how to fix them herself and becomes hooked on fixing and building things. Lisa suggests that Marge go into business as a carpenter, all the guys reject her so she gets Homer to show up at the jobs and then she takes over. Groundskeeper Willie is doing a search of all the kids for peanuts and accidentally lets Bart know that it's Skinner and so Bart starts acting up. The women at the home center mock Marge so she gets pissed, even more so when Lenny and Carl mock women and then crash the tool cabinet she's hiding in down the hill. The mayor wants Homer to repair the old roller coaster and Marge has had enough so she quits. Homer tries to do the job by hiring a crew but he doesn't know anything about carpentry and they all quit when they find out they won't be paid. Skinner has a nightmare about peanuts, he breaks into Dr Hibbert's office and finds out what Bart is allergic to. Homer builds a model of the roller coaster but it catches on fire when he tries it out, Lisa tells Homer to be honest.  Bart and Skinner have a battle with their allergies on the ends of sticks, Bart with a peanut and Skinner with shellfish. Bart and Skinner fall into a vat of peanut shrimp and both have massive reactions. When Homer unveils his roller coaster he pops open a bottle of champaign and it causes a break in the ride, Homer decides to prove the ride is safe by going on it however there are massive problems with it, Marge rushes in and fixes things before he goes by, he finally confesses the truth. After Homer gets to the end the whole ride collapses on him and he winds up in the hospital, Marge forgives him. Bart and Skinner as also in the hospital and they end up throwing peanuts and shrimp at each other. 

Regulars in the couch gag vending machine: Homer / Marge / Maggie / Lisa / Bart / Moe / Lenny / Carl / Patty / Apu / Mr. Burns / Mr. Smithers / Nelson / Mrs. Krabappal / Krusty

Mall Stores: 1987 Calendars!!! / Yesterday's Puppies (a bunch of dogs in cages too small) / Dukakis Campaign H.Q. / JC Pennys (was here but now it's a store selling Pakistani CDs / Captain Blip's Zapateria (arcade) / Rock Bottom book store.

Games at the Mall arcade: Click-Clack / Unipede / Remington Steele The Game / Rocky III vs Clara Peller "Where's the beef?" / Monkey Kong / Space-Tac-Toe / Polybius / Triangle Wars 

Books as the discount book store: Wisconsin From Above / Veteran's Day Parades / Smiles Of Ireland / The Kansas City Royals Forever Champions / Drink Your Own Blood And Save. Oprah recommends: "Buy Three Copies!" / I Scoundrel by Esme Delacroix (the romance author from the episode Diatribe Of A Mad Housewife) / The Time Life Carpenter's Library / Shakespeare / The How Why and Huh? Book of Weather

Marge makes a wooden sign for the front yard: The Simpsons © 20th Century Fox and a Westminster Abbey dog house for SLH.

 Marge's flier: Simpson Carpentry - Yes, We're Unlicensed! KL5-0123

Builders' Barn "Tell Mom You Love Her- Copy Her Keys". A spoof on Home Depot.

When Bart is using the school trophies as bowling pins he uses the ball Homer bought Marge for her birthday in the episode Life On The Fast Lane. One of the trophies is "High Jump Honorable Mention"

When Bart is forcing Skinner to do things in order to avoid peanuts he has to write on the chalkboard "A Baby Beat Me Up" This is a spoof on the chalkboard gag (the last one was in May), this is also a repeat of the joke when Bart made Skinner write on the board in the episode Skinner's Sense Of Snow.

Beat On The Brat by The Ramones plays during Bart's torturing of Skinner.

When Bart and Skinner are fighting with sticks Duel Of The Fates from Phantom Menace plays.

When Bart and Skinner fall into the vat of peanut shrimp Bart confesses that he's El Barto and Skinner shouts "noooo!" as a spoof on Darth Vader NOOOOO! in Revenge Of The Sith.

Homer Simpson Presents The Zoominator

When Homer rides the roller coaster he flashes the souvenir camera.

An interesting note, one of the old arcade games is Remington Steele and the plot of that show was a woman is a detective but she can't get any business without a fake male partner, then a con man shows up pretending to be Remington Steele. This is the Marge/Homer plot of this episode. 

Treehouse of Horror XVII

This episode premiered on November 5th, 2006. The lead in show was a Simpsons repeat (Treehouse of Horror XVI) and was followed by American Dad. It ran opposite Extreme Makeover, 60 Minutes and Football Night In America.

The episode opens on a creepy Burns mansion, a skeleton his hanging in the living room holding a March Of Dimes cup. The cameraman falls down a flight of stair. A coffin opens up and various animals run out from rats and spiders to rabbits. Mr. Burns comes out as the Crypt Keeper, a ghoulish Mr. Smithers closes up Moe in an Iron Maiden. His blood spells out Treehouse Of Horror XVII

Married To The Blob

Marge and Homer are making out in the back yard when a meteor crashes. Homer finds a glowing goo and eats it. Later that night he eats everything in the house, he tries to eat Bart but gets caught by Marge. He comes across a beach party, the teens are having a bbq fight and one falls in the fire so he eats the guy. He develops a craving for fat people so he eats the participants at an Octoberfest, baseball referees and the Facts Of Life reunion, customers at a Hawaiian shirt store. He bites Ned's head off and tosses away the rest of the body. Dr. Phil shows up to talk Homer out of his eating problem. To solve the problem the town sets up a Homeless Shelter but Homer is on the other side eating everyone. 

The title of this episode comes from the 1988 movie Married To The Mob

At Octoberfest Homer eats Uter. He was also eaten in Treehouse Of Horror V.

The segment also features a 50' Lenny and invisible Carl. 

You Gotta Know When to Golem

Krusty announces his show will be broadcast in HGTV, the image is horrible. Bart has brought his Krusty alarm clock to complain about it spraying acid. While looking around back stage he finds a Golem in the prop storage. Krusty tells the story about a Prague Rabbi who created the monster to defend the Jewish congregation, to get it to do your bidding you put a scroll with the task in its mouth, he uses it to kill hecklers. Bart puts a note saying "come to my house at midnight". Bart hears footsteps and groaning but it's just a drunk Homer, the the Golem shows up. Bart makes it kick Homer in the family jewels. At school he has it beat up the bullies. Lisa puts a note that says "speak" in the Golem's mouth and he does a series of Jewish jokes. He pukes up all the scrolls. Bart has the Golem kill Skinner, he starts to have a conscience about his actions. they make him a bride out of Play-Doh. They get married but the cops show up to arrest the Golem. Instead the police go to the Latkes bar in the basement of the Temple. 

The title of this episode came from the Kenny Rogers song The Gambler "know when to hold 'em"

Krusty's Prop Museum. Admission $50 No Refunds

Krusty is doing a Desperate Housefly sketch. Desperate Housewives ran from 2004 to 2012.

Springfield Shopper headline: Bullies Hospitalized. Nerds, dorks cautiously rejoice.

The Day The Earth Looked Stupid

The episode opens with a sepia tone version of Springfield, to let you know it's the 1930's. The Simpsons hear about an alien invasion from Mars on the Orson Welles Halloween broadcast. The entire town panics. Marge suggests that everyone pretend to be animals to avoid the aliens so they strip down and roll in the mud. Lisa shows up and tells them the whole thing was just a radio program. Kodos and Kang realize this is the perfect time to attack the planet since everyone will think it's another fake broadcast. After three years the fighting continues.

The title of this episode came from the 1951 movie The Day The Earth Stood Still.

Kwickee & Sons General Store. Today's Super-Lotto Jackpot: $18. This is a spoof on the Kwik-E-Mart.

Gloomy Sunday plays during the opening of the episode.

The sepia tone is based on the prequel parts of Godfather II

Abe Simpsons keeps referring to the First World War even though it's before the Second World War. "You'll find out"

Springfield Shopper, October 31st 1938, Two Cents. Broadcast Fools Nation, Springfield 

Wiggum mentions The Great Gildersleeve, this was a popular radio program back in the day.

The invasion of the Earth had been ongoing for three years (Bush's invasion of Iraq had reached the three year mark) Kang tells Kodos "You said we'd be greeted as Liberators". This was a comment made by Dick Cheney during the buildup to the invasion of Iraq in 2003. The alien attack is labeled Operation: Enduring Occupation. The Iraq invasion was called Operation Enduring Freedom. Kodos claims Earth was working on weapon of Mass Disintegration, Bush claimed the Iraqis were working on weapons of Mass Destruction. (They really went after the Bush war in Iraq with this segment). The occupation of Iraq lasted until 2011.

The segment ends with the song I Don't Want To Set The World On Fire by The Ink Spots. 

Richard Lewis voices the Male Golem, Fran Drescher voices the Female Golem. Dr. Phil does his own voice. Sir Mix-A-Lot sings Baby Likes Fat, a spoof on his song Baby Got Back. Maurice LaMarche does the voice of Orson Welles

In the closing credits is the name Al "July 27th 2007" Jean. This is the future release date for The Simpsons Movie.

G.I. (Annoyed Grunt) aka G.I D'oh

This episode premiered on November 12th 2006. The lead in show was the NFL Post Game Show and it was followed by American Dad. It ran opposite Extreme Makeover, The Amazing Race and Football Night In America.

The title comes from the action figure G.I. Joe.

The chalkboard gag is "We are not all naked under our clothes"(although we are) and the couch gag is the family sits on the couch, a conveyor belt then starts to roll forward, they go through a carwash with a water sprayer, soap foam, roller brushes and an air dryer. A group of guys come out and polish them. 

Bart and Milhouse both fall in love with a store mannequin then they see that the bullies are working at the shoe store, The Sole Provider, Bart and Milhouse decide to go harass them. The manager quits so the bullies tie up Bart and Milhouse in a spiderweb of shoe laces and then close the store. On their way out they are approached by military recruiters who talk to them about the latest "rap cd". The bullies won't sign up so the recruiters go to Springfield Elementary to show a movie, a knight pulls a sword from a stone and then turns into an attack helicopter. At the end of the film everyone signs up for pre enlistment. Marge makes Homer go talk to the recruiters and they agree to tear up Bart's contract but Homer signs up instead. After going through basic Homer is assigned to be a target for training. Homer remembers that it's Chinese New Year and fires off flairs, blinding the soldiers wearing night vision gear. The military tracks Homer to Springfield and invade the town. Homer hides out at Moe's, however he sells out Homer. Homer escapes down sewer drain leaving the rest of the squad behind. Homer sneaks into the house but the Army sends a drone after him. Cartoon music plays while it chases him, he uses several Loony Tunes tricks to escape including dressing up like a female drone. He locks it into a closet full of explosives and when it explodes the Warner Bros closing "That's All Folks" image pops up. The Army arrests all fat and bald people. Lisa complains about the military occupation of Springfield. Marge calls the phone tree to organize against the military. She has everyone bring their alcohol to the reservoir and the Army gets drunk on the local water. The next day the town has taken the Army prisoner, Lisa complains. The Colonel is forced to surrender but the military makes Homer their new recruiter at the mall. The Colonel announces all the names in the closing credit are being sent to the infantry.  

Kiefer Sutherland does the voice of The Colonel

Springfield Mall store Tatters-Clothes For Orphans (the sign is hand written)

Two episodes the mall was a complete disaster and now it's back to normal.

The zit faced teen's last name is Freedman

The military recruiters say that due to current world events the Army needs new recruits, this is a reference Bush's wars in Afghanistan and Iraq. 

The army recruitment movie has an attack helicopter shooting Nazis, a Middle Eastern Terrorist, Jason, it also fires a rocket into a hurricane. Did the Simpsons do another Trump prediction? After shooting the bad guys the crew jumps on stage and plays Paranoid by Black Sabbath, they are joined by Abe Lincoln and George Washington. 

Marge is carrying a bust of Homer but drops and breaks it when she finds out Bart signed up for the army. She has another one of Bart and it has The Cowabunga Kid across the bottom.

Lisa is a member of PETA and throws red paint on Krusty. Again, not my favorite character. She also asks when the Krusty movie is coming out, this is in reference to the announced date of the release of The Simpsons Movie. Krusty has to take off his fur coat and puts on a Panda one instead, with panda slippers and monkey head gloves. 

Army Recruitment Center "Suicidal Teens Welcome"

When Homer signs up for the Army he demands a parade, so they give him a Parade Magazine. It's The Who Makes What In America issue. There is an ad for Laramie cigarettes on the back. Parade stopped printing physical copies of the magazine in 2022 and ceased e publication in 2023.

Marge says with all the things Homer has done, go into space (Deep Space Homer), attend clown college (Homie The Clown), join the Navy (Simpson Tide) she never thought he'd join the Army. 

Fort Clinton (Not That Clinton)

During the training montage Toy Soldiers by Martika plays. 

Homer eating donuts while the rest of the unit does push-ups is a spoof on the scene from the 1987 movie Full Metal Jacket. 

Rainer Wolfcastle joined the Army to make recruitment films but is sent to the front lines. 

A soldier is painting "Death To Homer" with a bullseye on an image of Homer on a laser guided missile. 

Bart is making a list for new dads, Carl Or Lenny?

When Homer tries to think of a great military leader he pictures Cap'n Crunch

Moe plays Sudoku. It had gained popularity in the U.S. in 2004. 

Cletus is one of the soldiers in Homer's target outfit. His Christmas Card is a spoof on the controversial photo of Iraqi prisoners stacked naked while female soldiers point at them.

Barney, Skinner, Sanjay, CBG and Chalmers are detained by the military for being fat, bald or amused by Homer Simpson.

Homer hides out at the retirement home but grows tired of the boring stories.

Homer signing the surrender agreement with the Army is a spoof on the Japanese signing the surrender documents at the end of WWII. 

Let's hope this episode isn't a Trump prediction and the military ends up occupying cities in America.

Moe'N'a Lisa

This episode premiered on November 19th 2006. The lead in was a rerun of The Simpsons (The Italian Bob) and was followed by American Dad. It ran opposite Extreme Makeover, 60 Minutes and Football Night In America

The title comes from the da Vinci painting Mona Lisa

The couch gag is the family is placed on a computer couch image by a cursor however the whole thing is then transferred to the trash icon and "empty" is clicked. 

Homer has a string on his finger and "Don't forget" written backwards on his stomach. It's also written on the dog and in Maggie's cereal. The family drags Homer off to the Senior Olympics but he was suppose to remember going fishing with Moe for his birthday. Grandpa remembers going to the 1936 Olympics and accidentally throws a javelin into an assassin trying to kill Hitler.  Grandpa drops his dentures and Willie, wearing a rain poncho and carrying a scythe, picks them up and starts chasing him, Grandpa wins the hurdle race, Willie comes in third. When they get home they find Moe sitting on their front law so they duck down and drive into the back yard to avoid him. Moe throws a brick through the window with an angry note, Lisa decides to interview him as her interesting person in Springfield. Lisa finds fragments of Moe's writing and declares it poetry, Homer mocks him but falls out a window and down the fire escape. Lisa has Moe read his poem at school but the kids don't get it. Lisa sends Moe's poem to American Poetry Perspectives magazine but Homer is mad at them for not publishing his poem. Moe gets invited to the Wordloaf Festival in Vermont. Bart tells the famous writers that The Da Vinci Code made one million dollars and they groan and hit themselves with their books. Moe wipes chocolate on Tom Wolfe's white suit. Moe is about to tell the famous people that Lisa came up with the title but everyone is upset that he had help, so he says he made it up himself, Lisa is upset. During the panel Moe is asked who his influences are but he doesn't have any names. Lisa asks him about his influences and Moe says "none". Lisa whines. Moe shows up and asks Lisa to organize his scribbles into a poem but she runs off. While trying to put the notes together the papers blow into the lake and are ruined. Bart and Homer get mad at Moe when Lisa runs away crying. Moe has to read a new poem, he just reads what he wrote off the elevator wall and the TV guide. He then makes up a poem about Lisa on the spot. Just then Homer and Bart try to pour some maple syrup on Moe but it takes so long that he just steps out of the way. Michael Chabon and Jonathan Franzen get into a fight. Lisa and Moe become friends again and go to duckpin bowling. At the end Jameson demands poems about Spider-Man. Homer does a maple syrup tasting like someone would do a wine testing, the woman at the stand wants to know if he's "touched in the head" and Bart says "yes". 

J. K. Simmons does the voice of J. Jonah Jameson. Thomas Wolfe, Gore Vidal, Michael Chabon and Jonathan Franzen do their own voices.

Senior Olympics "Who will break the 4-hour mile?"

Lisa's list of Fascinating Sprinfielders she's tried to interview: Milhouse's Dad / Comptroller Atkins / Gil / Very Tall Man / Squeaky Voiced Teen. 

The Old Jewish Guy does the high dive but his arm skin makes him fly like Rocky Squirrel from Bullwinkle. Even the music from the cartoon plays. 

Regent Hotel "The Buzziest Neon In Town"

J. Jonah Jameson, from the Spider-Man movies, is the editor of American Poetry Perspectives.

Wordloaf Literary Conference "Warning: Philip Roth May Be Moody"

The cop from Rhode Island is a little person on a Big Wheel with a flashing light. 

The Da Vinci Code was published in 2003. 

Writer's festival sign. Today's Panel: Writers On Writing. Tomorrow's Panel: Janitors On Janiting 

The only book Moe ever read was Super Hounds: the Ultimate Greyhound Betting System.

The family goes to the Vermont Teddy Bear Factory. This is a real place. 

Tonight Wordloaf Honors Moe Szyslak- Best New Poet "Warning: First Ten Rows May Get Wit"

Thomas Pynchon is as the dinner with a bag over his head. He was first seen in the episode Diatribe Of A Mad Housewife.

During their fight Franzen hits Chabon with a framed print of Snoopy using a typewriter on top of his doghouse. 

J. Jonah Jameson wants to know what his assistant is waiting for, "Chinese New Year?" In the previous episode Homer celebrated Chinese New Year by shooting off flares.

Ice Cream Of Margie (with the light blue hair)

This episode premiered on November 26th, 2006. The lead in show was the NFL Post Game Show and it was followed by American Dad. It ran opposite Extreme Makeover, The Amazing Race and Football Night In America.

The title is based on the song Jeanie With The Light Brown Hair

The couch gag is a set of eyeballs are seen in the dark, however when the light clicks on we see the family with human heads but cockroach bodies. They all scamper, Maggie hides behind the couch but is still looking out. 

Bart is digging the marshmallow bits out of the cereal and feeds the rest to SLH. The guys are playing Rolo-Polo at the plant, a rubber ball and they are on rolling chairs trying to shoot it into a sideways trash can.  Burns catches them and starts chewing out Homer except an ice cream truck shows up and Homer can't think of anything else, Burns fires him. The ice cream man drops dead while giving Homer his change. Homer buys the truck from the widow and has it pimped out. Marge is depressed after seeing a talk show about successful women. She's mad that Homer loves being an ice cream man. She starts playing with Homer's thrown away popsicle sticks and makes a model of Maggie, Homer loves it. Marge starts making multiple statues and then spells out "Two Weeks Later" across the bottom of the screen. The Channel 6 helicopter is following a high speed chase until Snake escapes in a helicopter, he spots Marge's sculptures and wants to put her on the air. The YeeHaw Texan wants to fund an art show of Marge's sculptures. Marge wants Homer to be at her show for emotional support but he still has to run his route, he promises to be back at 3:00 (if you've ever seen the show you know where this is going). Homer comes across a gathering of single dads on visitation day, Rainer Wolfcastle is one of the fathers. Homer finds out  that it's 38 seconds until 3 and takes off at high speed. While taking a shortcut an owl, Boy Scout and bear wind up on Homer's windshield, he hits the wipers but when the view is clear he is at the house and crashes through all the sculptures and Marge is mad at him. Naturally Marge and Homer's marriage is in trouble. Marge takes off so Homer and the kids go to find her, she's on top of City Hall. Homer thinks she's going to jump but instead she made a giant statue of Homer standing in his underwear eating a donut.  200 years later Marge's statue is being studied in a museum. It turns out iPods became self aware and took over the world and Marge's statue is the last one ever made.

Krusty Charms, a clown version of Lucky Charms.

Ice Cream guy funeral. They play Taps on the loudspeaker, a 21 bell jingle and then use an oversized ice cream scoop to fill in the grave. 

Get Ur Freak On by Missy Elliott plays when Homer reveals his pimped out ice cream truck. The whole reveal is a reference to the show Pimp My Ride that ran from 2004 to 2007. Homer putting on his ice cream suit is a reference to Da Ali G Show.

Marge watches Opal. This is a spoof on Oprah. Opal is promoting the book Life Beyond Wife by Professor Stein (a book about successful women who never got married or had kids)

When Homer's truck arrives in the neighborhood Dire Straights Money For Nothing plays. 

Chuck Mangione's Feels So Good plays while Marge is making popsicle stick figures. 

Marge's sculptures: Maggie, Bart and Lisa, Fat Tony strangling a guy, Dredrick Tatum, Grandpa, Patty and Selma, The Flanders complete with Maude, Reverend Lovejoy, Apu, Professor Frink, Sea Captain, Disco Stu, The Central City Goofball, CBG, Moe (behind the bar), Skinner, Bumblebee Man, Krusty, Lenny and Carl. 

Kent Brockman's award submitted segment, Kent Brockman's "Kent-resting People"

Sneaky dirty joke: When Homer brings Marge more popsicle sticks he says "This is the most fun I ever had giving your wood"

When Marge and Homer "snuggle" he plays Pop Goes The Weasel. 

Divorced Dad Visitation Jamboree.

Dated Reference, Homer uses a Polaroid camera to slip photos to Marge under the door.

iPods overthrow the world. There's a Simpsons prediction that didn't come true. (iPod 5th Generation by the way)

This was another episode where Marge and Homer's marriage was in trouble but somehow he managed to talk his way back into her heart. These are among my least favorite episodes. It's also a guarantee that Homer won't be an ice cream man in the next episode and the whole thing will just be forgotten, including his getting fired. 

So I've come to the end of another 5 episode. I think I saw the Treehouse of Horror episode before now but the rest are all new to me. 

 The Simpsons 376-380

Regarding Margie 

This episode premiered on May 7th 2006. The lead in show was King Of The Hill and it was followed by Family Guy. It ran opposite Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, Cold Case and The West Wing

The title of this episode is based on the 1991 movie Regarding Henry (so is the plot)

The chalkboard gag is "I will not leak the plot of the movie"and the couch gag is a repeat of the Transformers.

Nelson, Bart and Milhouse are painting street addresses on the curb and changing $5. Ned offers them a $100 if they'll paint his garage however it's not a scam but honest work so they run away. They do Homer's address but he refuses to pay so they leave him one number short, 74, he messes up the rest of the job. Lisa complains. After the Oakland A's drive by he wipes off what he added (see below), the postal delivery woman shows up with a package for 74 Evergreen Terrace, it turns out to be Omaha Steaks so Homer keeps it. Homer and Marge go to a Jewish wedding. The people who's address is 74 Evergreen Terrace win the Clean For A Day contest but Marge keeps the prize, she imagines the cleaning service judging her for her messy house so she does a massive cleaning however she finds a spot and mixes all her cleaning chemicals together and passes out on the three leg stool. At the hospital Dr. Hibbert holds up two fingers and when Marge gives him the right number he puts them back in the jar. Marge has amnesia and doesn't recognize the family. The insurance company kicks Marge out and she has to go home with the family, the first thing Homer does is strangle Bart and she gets mad. Marge recognizes Maggie, when Lisa tells her about sound triggering memory Marge remembers her, then she remembers Milhouse, followed by Bart. However she still doesn't remember Homer. Homer tries using his scrapbook but it's just photos of him in fights. Home wants to "snuggle" but Marge won't go for it. Patty and Selma tell Marge that her brain is trying to save her from Homer. Homer takes Marge out on a date to the mini golf castle where they first "snuggled", but she gets mad at him for how they first got together. Homer has to move out, Bart blames the moving out for his lousy report card. Homer moves in with Abe at the retirement home. Patty and Selma take Marge to a Singles Mixer in Shelbyville, she ends up going to get coffee with someone. Lenny and Carl call Homer to warn him about Marge's date so he rushes to the pier however when she tells her date about the kids he walks out on her. Marge overhears Homer telling the guy off for leaving such a wonderful woman so he drives her home. When Homer mentions drinking beer Marge suddenly remembers him. The End. Marge and Homer talk about remembering the names in the credits. 

Sal Bando and Gene Tenace of the Oakland A's do their own voices.

The chalkboard gag is a reference to The Simpsons Movie. After 5 years they had started production on it but it wouldn't be released until the summer of 2007.

Homer's address paint job 74 Oakland A's-Best Team Ever! Just as he finishes the 1974 Oakland A's drive by and give him a thank you honk. 

The steak package is addressed to Scott & Brenda Weingarten. 

Marge falling on the stool is a spoof on Million Dollar Baby (spoiler alert)

Marge reads Amnesia Monthly "Tips On Finding Your Way Home"

During a tour of the town Sideshow Bob and Bumblebee Man vs Sea Captain and Duffman are having a horsey fight over which kind of cherries are the best. A horsey fight is holding a person on your shoulder while they try to push someone off another person's shoulders, usually in a pool.

Homer's photo album: Him fighting with Bush sr. (Two Bad Neighbors) / Fighting with Bush jr. (Bush jr was President at the time) / punching a bag of apples.

Mrs. Krabappal gives Seymore a birthday tumble in the putt putt castle. 

Welcome to Shelbyville: We'll Put Syrup On Anything. 

The Monkey Suit

This episode premiered on May 14th, 2006. The lead in show was King Of The Hill and it was followed by Malcolm In The Middle. It ran opposite Extreme Makeover, Survivor and The West Wing.

The chalkboard gag is "Je Ne Parle Pas Francais" (I don't speak French)" and the couch gag is a repeat of the photographic flash forward.

Booberella is holding a Labor Day marathon "of blood" and reminds her viewers that soon they have to go back to school, Bart is unhappy, he runs around town doing his summer list in one day. Lisa shows up and says that the family promised to go to the museum and they all groan. Marge is happy the museum has an exhibition on weaving however they just replaced it with The History Of Weapons. Homer is upset that there is a long line so buts in front of Ned Flanders, soon everyone is and Ned gets pushed to the back of the line. At the children's touch wall Maggie finds a switchblade and forces Marge to turn over the candy. Homer tries out the bullet proof vest however his ricochets destroy the rest of the museum. Bart straps Milhouse to the medieval stretcher. By the time Ned gets to the exhibit it's closing, he takes the boys to the Hall Of Man and freaks out that it features evolution and a unisex bathroom. Ned goes to Reverend Lovejoy with his crisis, he sees it as a chance to regain the members he lost to the Episcopalians who had installed vibrating pews. They go to Skinner and insist on Creationism being taught in schools, they threaten to void his car lease with the Christian Brothers Automotive so the school is forced to teach the religious version, Lisa complains. The school makes the kids take a test and all the answers are "God Did It'. Lisa insists Marge choose between Science or Belief, she goes out to join Homer on a trampoline. Lisa goes to the city council to complain about Creationism being taught in schools. The school has to make a choice to only teach one subject, they choose Creationism. Lisa leaves a note on the smart kid's lockers inviting them to a secret meeting in the school's Single Purpose room at lunch. Nelson shows up at Lisa's secret class and is disappointed because he thought they were going to light spiders on fire, it turns out he's in the wrong classroom and the bullies are next door. Lisa's class is raided by the police and she's arrested for teaching evolution, meanwhile Snake is firing a gun from the roof of the Kwik-E-Mart but they don't have the time to stop him. In the trial of God vs. Lisa Simpson her lawyer is ACLU appointed Clarisse Drummond and the religious crowd has Southern lawyer Wallace Brady. The defenses calls Frink who says God is a powerless figurehead. The Creationist says he has a PhD in Truthology from Christian Tech. When Lisa is about to give up Marge reads The Origin Of The Species and comes up with an idea, Bart tries to get Milhouse to take Lisa's place but it's really Nelson in disguise. When Ned is testifying about the Bible Marge gives Homer a bottle without a twist top, Homer acts up and Ned calls him a big ape, and loses the case. Ned and Lisa make up but Rod turns out to be Nelson in disguise. 

Melanie Griffith does her own voice and Larry Hagman does Wallace Brady. 

The plot of this episode was based on the 1925 Scopes Monkey Trial

Grandpas Bucket List: Sleep With Esther Williams / First White Man In The Negro Leagues. He thinks he can do both if it wasn't for his trick knee

Bart's Summer Activity List: Win A Baseball Game / Appear In A Summer Stock Play / See A Summer Blockbuster / Have a Summer Romance (the girl's summer list is Kiss A 100 Boys)

Homer's Summer List: Check Out That New Store / Find, Destroy Atlantis / Fake Interest In Son

When Bart plays baseball the coach is based on Boilermaker, the character Walther Matthau played in the 1976 movie The Bad News Bears. When Bart hits a home run the theme from The Natural plays. 

Springfield Community Theater: Grease 2, The musical based on the sequel to the movie based on the musical.

Bart goes to see a version of the 1997 movie Men In Black. The Will Smith character says "Get outta my face your raggedy maggots!" and Bart realizes why people have been saying it all summer. 

The Natural History Museum has an exhibition Looms, Labor and Liberation - A History Of Women Weaving. Marge had showed off her weaving skills in the episode Lisa's Wedding. The exhibit changes to The History Of Weapons sponsored by Kellog's (The show's spelling), there is an image of "Tony the Tiger" being stabbed, shot and with a stick of dynamite in his mouth. 

IMAX: Coming soon, Up Your Nostril. The movie for the exhibit is Nunchuks: Cool But Useless. 

During the museum's Bible creationism display "What A Fool Believes" by the Doobie Brothers with Kenny Loggins plays. 

First Church Of Springfield message board. Today: Church Council Meeting, Topic: Religion.

When Ned insists Skinner teach alternative forms of evolution he asks if they means Lamarckian, a theory that beings pass on traits to their offspring that they developed throughout their lives such as physical or language adaption. 

Skinner plays a video for Lisa, So You're Calling God A Liar! An Unbiased Comparison Of Evolution and Creationism. The video shows Darwin as a drunkard who makes out with Satan. 

Homer is playing on a trampoline in the back yard. The family had one in the episode Bart's Inner Child

Town Meeting Today: Finding A Husband For Our Sister City.

Springfield Elementary text book: Life In These 38 States. This book would have had to be written between 1876 and 1889 when Colorado was a state but the Dakotas weren't. There is a historical error on the cover, Oklahoma is shown as a state but wasn't admitted to the Union until 1907, at the time it was known as Indian Territory prior to the Oklahoma Land Rush of 1889. 

Lisa's secret class is called Viva La Evolution. (a reference to the chalkboard gag perhaps?)

Members of the jury, Kent Brockman / Bernice Hibbert / Barney / Bumble Bee Man / YEEEESSS man from Costingtons / Sea Captain / Sanjay / Kerney / Cookie Quan / Lenny / Carl / Luanne Van Houten

Marge has a picture with Snoopy "Happiness is...Met Life Casualty Insurance" This is a spoof on the 1962 Peanut's book Happiness Is A Warm Puppy and the insurance commercials. 

The Nelson in the Milhouse disguise and puzzle piece fade out is a spoof on the 1966 Mission Impossible TV series. 

 This episode ran in 2006 but is more relevant now with MAGA trying to force religion into schools and ban books. 

Marge And Homer Turn A Couple Play

This episode premiered on May 21st 2006. The lead in show was a Simpsons repeat (Homer Simpson, This Is Your Wife) and followed by Family Guy. It ran opposite Extreme Makeover, Cold Case and Dateline NBC

The chalkboard gag is "Have a great summer everyone" and the couch gag is a repeat of the furniture attacking the town. 

The title is based on the baseball saying "turning a double play" meaning getting two outs at one time. it's a pretty awkward title.

Homer sees the Isotopes are having a winning season and rushes to see a game. Tabitha Vixx does a sexy version of the National Anthem and her husband Buck Mitchelle has a lousy game. Buck sees Homer and Marge kissing and gets an idea, he comes by the Simpsons house and ask them to help him with his marriage in exchange for season tickets. Marge is worried but Homer talks her into it. Buck says he thought his wife would settle down and support his baseball career. She's tired of being trapped in a pointless marriage. Homer asks Buck to sign a bag full of baseballs. Marge suggests the couple do something together, Tabitha is going to be a presenter at the EPSYs and Buck is up for an award, Marge suggests they go in the same limo. The Simpsons advice is working and Buck is back playing great. The family gets invited to Tabitha's concert, Homer goes back stage and she asks him for a neck rub. Buck overhears them and busts in, he punches Homer in the face. Buck starts playing bad again and everyone is mad at the Simpsons, but Marge doesn't want to help since she's jealous of Tabitha. Tabitha shows up to tell Marge that she's leaving Buck however she tries to help save their marriage. The Duff blimp flies over the stadium with a message from Tabitha saying she loves Buck however it's a trick by Homer. Buck hits a ball into the blimp and it crashes into the stadium. Buck panics because he can't find Tabitha. Buck is about to beat up Homer for lying but Marge comes on the Jumbotron and saves him, Tabitha comes on and says she'll take Buck if he can guess the nights attendance, they decide to stick together. 

Mandy Moore does the voice of Tabitha Vixx and Stacy Keach returns as the voice of Howard K. Duff.

The plot of this episode was based on the 1985 film The Slugger's Wife.

The chalkboard gag is a reference to this being the last episode of the 17th season and the next episode would be on September 10th. 

The Simpsons watch Hunch, a detective show about a guy who "feels" like someone committed a crime. 

Self aware joke, Lisa says it's amazing they got 512 shows out of the premise of Hunch. This is episode 378 of The Simpsons. Right now they are working on episode 776. (Holy crap, I'm almost half way, plus the movie)

The Isotopes are having a winning season so their fair weather fans come out. This was the plot of Hungry Hungry Homer. 

Grandpa said he played baseball in 1942 for the Springfield Floozies. He was exposes when he lost his wig and got drafted. Jasper is also hiding out on the team despite having a full beard and mustache. This is a spoof on the 1992 film A League Of Their Own

The Inquisitor: Krusty's Sad Last Days. The image is of Krusty from the episode Lisa's Wedding. 

Marge reads Married Alive! A Wife-Saving Guide 

Homer has stolen Lisa's 2nd Grade Spelling Champion award, crossed out here name and what she got it for and wrote in Homer and Counselor. It is signed by Skinner and Krabbappal. 

Springfield Coliseum. Tonight--Tabitha Vixx! Warning: First Ten Rows May Get Horney. 

When the Duff Blimp flies over the stadium with a message to Buck from Tabitha the announcer says "Said Zeppelin has a whole lotta love" This is a reference to the 1969 Led Zeppelin song.

The blimp crashing into the stadium is a spoof on the 1977 movie Black Sunday. Buck says "This is the worst blimp crash ever" Grandpa shouts "Too Soon!"

Take Me Out To The Ballgame plays when Homer and Marge drive off.

This was the last episode of the 17th season. Holy crap that's a lot of episodes. Most shows are lucky if they run for 3 seasons. Why did I decide to do this again? Oh well, on to Season 18, and then the movie. 

The Mook, The Chef, The Wife and her Homer.

This episode premiered on September 6th 2006. The lead in show was The NFL Postgame Show and it was followed by American Dad. It ran opposite the movie The Path To 9/11, 60 Minutes and Football Night In America

The title of this episode is based on the 1989 movie The Cook, The Thief, His Wife and Her Lover.

The couch gag is a game of musical chairs. Pop Goes The Weasel plays while the family runs around them, when the music stops everyone sits down except Homer who gives a sad mmmmm.

Bart grabs the last seats on the school bus and puts his skateboard on the the other empty one. When Lisa complains to Otto she breaks his Walkman and he freaks out. The kids help him out by singing Old McDonald Had A Fart. On the way to school he sees Metallica broke down on the side of the road, while he's trying to convince them to hop on the school bus Bart steals the bus and Moleman gives the band a ride. He's left alone on the side of the road. Bart actually drives to school but Otto catches up with him and spanks Bart, Skinner catches him and suspends him. Marge has to drive the carpool, they pick up Michael, the weird shy kid. He forgot his math book so Marge drives him up to the house and that's when they discover that Fat Tony is his father. Suddenly everyone is afraid of Michael. Lisa feels sorry for Michael so she sits with him at lunch. Michael makes Lisa a salad from stuff growing around the playground, Lisa suggests he become a chef even though Fat Tony wants him to go into the family business "waste management". When the Calibrese family tries to run him off the road he uses Milhouse's three ring binder to flatten their tires, they crash into a truckload of baking soda and breath a sigh of relief until a tanker full of vinegar crashes into them, they say the foaming is not that bad and then a truckload of TNT crashes into that and blows them all up. Michael invites the Simpsons over for dinner. It turns out Fat Tony had a meeting with the Calibrese family on the same night. Michael makes soufflés for dinner, Lisa insists he show them to his father, who just made a deal with the Calibrese telling them that Michael would take over and he's relentless, however once they find out he wants to be a chef they disrespect him and plan on killing Fat Tony. The Calibrese show up in an attack helicopter and shoot Fat Tony, he winds up in the hospital for three months. Homer offers to run The Family until Fat Tony recovers. Homer's first job is to collect $50 from Moe, he threatens Homer and makes him pay his bar tab of $50 and then only gives Homer $25 back. Bart goes to Krusty to collect for keeping McDonalds and Burger King out of Springfield. Ned comes buy with Homer's phone bill but offers to pay it himself. Michael sees Homer and Bart at their worst and decides to get out of the business so he holds a sit down, he offers to surrender the family territory in exchange for protection of his family and The Simpsons. At dinner the other mob bosses all drop dead from poisoned meatballs, Michael had used his father's recipe for dinner with his enemies. Lisa asks Michael if the dinner was an accident and he tells her to not ask about his business, then he and the bullies do The Godfather ending, however the door swings open and they are playing Hot Wheels. 

Joe Mantegna return as the voice of Fat Tony, Joe Pantoliano does the voice of Dante, Michael Imperioli does Dante Jr. and Metallica play themselves.

Otto listens to An American Band by Grand Funk Railroad.

Springfield Shopper headline: Local Man Thinks Wrestling Is Real (Picture of Homer cheering)

Michael is based on Michael Corleone from The Godfather.

When Lunch Lady Doris opens up a can of WWII Surplus beans Raiders Of The Lost Ark ghosts come out. 

When Fat Tony tells the carpool kids they'll sleep with the fishes he's referring to a Finding Nemo bedspread. The movie came out in 2003.

When Fat Tony is driving the carpool he's listening to Woke Up This Morning by Coldharbour Lane, the theme from The Sopranos. 

Milhouse has two binders, Garfield and Love Is

Fat Tony uses a Palm Pilot to keep notes. In the modern world they are TouchPads.

Homer says he learned all about the mob from the 2004 film Shark Tale. 

Fat Tony's meatball recipe: Meat / Spices / Poison (Serves 6-10 Enemies)

The Godfather Theme plays over the closing credits.

Jazzy And The Pussycats.

This episode premiered on September 17th 2006. The lead in show was 'Til Death and it was followed by American Dad. It ran opposite Extreme Makeover, 60 Minutes and Football Night In America.

The title is based on the 1970 animated series and 2001 film Josie and the Pussycats. 

The couch gag is most of the family runs into the living room however a King Kong Homer shows up, grabs Marge and climbs to the top of the Empire State Building where he's attacked by biplanes. 

Homer's former wife Amber has died and they hold a funeral for her but Bart keeps acting up. A mishap with a paddle ball causes everyone to yell at Marge. They take Bart to a child psychologist, Homer wants to put Bart on drugs but the doctor suggests the drums, it turns out he's a natural, by imagining the drums are Homer. Bart is playing the drums and seen going down the street with every beat, however at the corner he literally runs into the White Stripes and they plan to kick his butt. They chase him down the street but there is a pause in the beat just as they are jumping across an open span on a bridge and they fall down onto a garbage barge. Bart starts drumming all night so Homer turns on the white noise machine, Bart plays louder so Homer changes the machine over to traffic noise combined with a circus fire. Lisa offers to take Bart to the children's bebop brunch at Jazzy Goodtimes. Lisa invites Bart on stage and several guys in the audience see them, and come over to invite Bart to join them, Lisa is upset. Homer and Marge come by to see him and are very proud. The musicians want Bart to join their combo and Homer wonders if it will lead to a contract with Groove-Tone Records, Lisa is very jealous. She decides to try Bart's skateboard and winds up crashing into spicy salsa in the gift shop. The band calls Bart "Tic-Tock" and Lisa complains that she always wanted a Jazz nickname, so they call her "Downbeat" since she's bring everyone down. Gil tries to convince Bart to let him be his manager but the family just walks away. To cheer Lisa up Marge takes her to the pound to get a puppy. Lisa picks a puppy but the one she left behind haunts her. The next day she goes to get the scruffy one and ends up taking another dog and a bird. Soon she's being followed by various animals including the ones from a closed circus, she hides them in the attic. The animals make a lot of noise so Lisa goes to see what is happening, she finds Bart and the jazz musicians hanging out with the animals. The tiger attacks Bart and damages his arm, ending his drumming career. Homer announces he's now a Mexican Wrestler, Taco Belly. The family gives away the animals until Wiggum shows up to tell them they have until Midnight to get rid of all the animals, then rides off on an ostrich. The jazz musicians ask Bart to get surgery but it's too expensive so they plan on holding a benefit concert for him. Bart feels bad for Lisa so he uses the money to build The Lisa Simpson Home For Abandon Animals. A jazz version of the closing song plays over the credits. 

Meg and Jack White do their own voices. 

The couch gag is a spoof on the 1933 movie King Kong. Homer also played King Kong in the feature King Homer in the episode Treehouse Of Horror III. (Note, I thought Homer tossed Marge off the building but he caught her with his foot)

Funeral Today: Homer Simpson's Vegas Wife. Amber Pia Gow first appeared in the episode Viva Ned Flanders, however (continuity error) she "divorced" Homer in her wedding vows when she married Abe in the episode Brawl In The Family.

The Blue Man Group appear at the funeral. When one of them is choking on the paddle ball ball someone gives him the Heimlich he coughs up several balls and turns yellow.

Child Psychiatrist "Where Imaginary Friends Come To Die"

The psychiatrist is Dr. Brentano, he first appeared as Marge and Homer's marriage councilor in the episode Break My Wife, Please.

When Bart is playing the drums The Hardest Button To Button by the White Stripes plays. The scene is a spoof on their video for the song.

Jazzy Goodtime's is based on The House Of Blues. The Joint Is... Jumpin' / Disappointing / Closed For Inventory. 8-Hour Benefit, 2 songs will be played. 

Lisa's band is her, Datalore, Uter, Martin and now Bart. They play Take Five by Dave Brubaker. Ralph shows up with a Fisher Price toy mower. 

Professional jazz players: Defonzo "Skinny" Palmer / Marcus "Marbles" Le Marquez 

The Skinny Palmer Trio featuring Tic Tock Simpsons.

Jazz magazines featuring Bart: Blowin' / The Sugar Sheet "We ask Bart the questions Blowin' wouldn't or couldn't". Lisa is on the cover of Dream Denied Magazine "Downbeat Simpson"

Springfield Animal Shelter "Were a pet store for poor people"

When Lisa is walking down the street with her new pets Little Green Bag by Jan Visser and George Baker plays, this is a spoof on a scene from the 1992 film Reservoir Dogs.

Richard Sakai appears at the Jazz benefit. He first appeared in the episode One Fish, Two Fish, Blowfish, Blue Fish (He is a real person and a producers for the show)

This episode was all over the road. Bart acts up in church, becomes a star, Lisa adopts animals, instead of getting the surgery to fix his nerve damage Bart builds an animal habitat. It's also another example of why I don't like Lisa, Bart finds something he's good at and she selfishly destroys it. 

This is also the end of another 5 episodes. They have become rather strange with more and more outlandish plot lines making the overall show more and more cartoonish. I almost dread seeing what is coming in the future. Seriously, why am I still doing this?

Also, I'm back from my vacation, miss me? I went to Universal Studios and rode the Simpsons ride. No spoilers for those who have never been on it but all the original voice actors appear.