The Simpson 231-235

E-I-E-I-(Annoyed Grunt)

This episode premiered on November 7th, 1999. The lead in show was King Of The Hill and it was followed by Futurama. It ran opposite The W.W.O. Disney (Annie 1999), 60 Minutes and Third Watch.

The title comes from the song Old McDonald

The chalkboard gag is "I did not win the Nobel Fart Prize" and the couch gag is there is a bouncer in front of the couch, the family is waved in except for Homer who is turned away.

The Simpsons are at the theater and there is a Saving Private Ryan style Normandy Beach scene, but it turns out to be a commercial for Buzz Cola "Buzz Cola, the taste you'll kill for. Available in ze lobby" Homer says " I have to go to ze lobby" Homer gets the pimple face kid to put butter on his Milk Duds. After the movie Snake pushes his way past Marge and calls her Q-Tip, Homer decides to act like Zorro, grabs the janitor's glove and challenges Snake to a duel with a face slap, Snake runs off and the audience cheers. Later Moe calls Homer "heavyset" so he glove slaps him, Moe give him a free beer. Homer gets out of control with his duel challenges, he slaps the toll booth operator, Kirk Van Houten at mini golf and Dr. Hibbert who is trying to give him a shot. When he cuts in line at the Kwik-E-Mart he slaps a Southern Gentleman who accepts the challenge and calls him out for a duel, pistols at dawn. Apu has wills and headstones on aisle 6, Homer buys one. The next day the Southerner shows up, Marge tries to smuggle Homer out in an old Christmas tree, the colonel wants to shoot it up for them, Bart accepts the offer but Marge rushes to the car. They run into Jimmy Carter ands him to build them a house, Homer call him a lousy bum so Carter challenges him to a duel. They end up at the old family farm. Homer starts up the old tractor but it crashes on top of him, this is a running gag in the episode. Lisa finds a sheep in need of shearing but when she finishes it turns out to be a rat. Homer plants random seeds, tobacco and tomatoes, including candy corn. When nothing grows he calls Lenny for plutonium which he sprays on the crops. Tomatoes start to grow however they muted with tobacco, Bart eats one and spits it out, but becomes instantly addicted. Homer calls his new crop ToMacco and charges $1 a basket. Wiggum comes by because Ralph wants to tip over a cow. Ralph and Clancy eat a ToMacco and also become addicted "It tastes like grandma". Laramie Cigarettes show up and want to buy up Homer's crop for $150 million, Lisa complains about the evils of the tobacco company but the family misinterprets her comments and demand $150 billon. When they get back to the farm the discover the neighbor's animals have eaten up all their crops except for one plant. The animals go nuts and try to break into the house, including the elephant the neighbors were using to measure the corn (an Oklahoma musical reference). Homer throws the last plant but Mindy from the tobacco company catches it, they hop in the helicopter and take off. Midair they get attacked by a crazed sheep and crash. The family returns home but then remembers the Southern Gentleman is there to duel with Homer. Just before he fires he smells one of Marge's mince pies and almost ends the duel but Homer complains "are we gonna do this or what?" so the Gentleman turns around and shoots him in the arm. The song Glove Slap plays over the closing credits.

The b-52's perform Glove Slap which is a spin on their song Love Shack and perhaps one of the best songs in the overall series. Many a day I've sang "Glove Slap, shut yer big yap"

Movies at the Springfield Googolplex Theaters: My Dinner With Jar Jar (a combination of My Dinner with Andre and the annoying character from Star Wars) / Mars Needs Towels (A reference to the movie Mars Needs Women and the Douglas Adams book Hitchhikers Guide which suggests always knowing where your towel is) / That 70's Movie (A reference to That 70's Show and sitcoms that later get turned into movies, which will happen to The Simpsons) / Shakespeare In Heat (Shakespeare In Love) / Facepuncher IV / Das Booty Call (a combination of Das Boot and Booty Call)  / The Poke Of Zorro (The Mask Of Zorro)

The Zorro movie has the credits, to see all the names and what character they played check out one of the fan sites. There is one worth mentioning Mule Beating Man...."Gus" This is a reference to Disney's 1976 movie Gus The Field Goal Kicking Mule

The Souther Gentleman's RV has a confederate flag on the roof (The Dukes Of Hazzard reference), an I (Heart) Dueling and Honk If You Demand Satisfaction bumper sticker and mud flaps with his image holding guns (a spoof on the Yosemite Sam mud flaps). 

Homer calls Ned from Donny's Discount Gas. It was first seen in the episode In Marge We Trust.

The farm has a skeleton of a horse standing upright in the front yard.

Sneed's Feed & Seed. Formerly Chuck's. People claim that this is a hidden dirty joke by replacing the first letters in Chucks with the first letters from Feed and Seed. Think about it. 

Homer rubs some plutonium on his teeth to make them glow. This is a bit of a twisted reference to the Radium Girls, these were women who worked in watch factories painting glow in the dark watches, they would rub the radium powder on their teeth. Most died from radiation poisoning. There's a great documentary on the story.

 Homer says two quotes he claims are from movies but were made up by the writers of The Simpsons. He claims one of the lines is from the movie Waiting To Exhale. The movie was also mentioned in the episode All Singing, All Dancing.

When they show a time laps of the crops growing they play the theme song from the 60's sitcom Green Acres.

When the animals attack the farm house this is a spoof on the 1968 movie Night Of The Living Dead.

One of the tobacco executives is on Sugar Busters, a diet plan that came out in 1996. 

Continuity Error: In the episode Grandpa vs. Sexual Inadequacy Homer and Abe burned down the old farm house. 

At a time when The Simpsons episodes were rather iffy this one was actually pretty solid. It had Homer getting himself into a situation, the farm storyline that carried over from a previous episode and a conclusion to the original story of the duel. It also has a great spoof on the song Love Shack and Homer's hi jinx move the story along instead of just being filler. Truly one of the better ones of this time period. 

Hello Gutter, Hello Fadder

This episode premiered on November 14th 1999. It ran in its usual time slot and opposite The W.W.O. Disney (Space Jam), Touched By An Angel and Third Watch.

The title is based on the Alan Sherman song Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh. 

The chalkboard gag is "I won't not use no double negatives" and the couch gag is a cement truck backs up and pours the family on the couch, Homer cracks in half.

Homer hits the snooze button at 7 AM and sleeps until 11. Since he missed the day before he's 26 hours late for work. Homer gets mad at the traffic and drives up the medium. When Wiggum asks him where the fire is Homer points at the police station. Homer gets a ticket for a 3-17, pointing out police stupidity. Homer gets caught by Burns and tries to hide out in the core but Burns grabs him with the arm gloves, and kicks him with the leg protectors. As punishment Homer has to eat all the nuclear waste. Homer calls Marge to tell her that they have to take Lenny to the hospital, even though they've gone bowling, Marge is extra upset. Homer gets super mad and takes his frustration out on the pins, and starts to bowl a perfect game. In the last frame Lenny says a bunch of bowling terms for missing so Homer hits him in the stomach with a ball and then manages to bowl a perfect game. Homer is invited to school to talk about his perfect game and goes on the Springfield Squares, but he doesn't know if he's suppose to read from the jokes or the real answers. Ron Howard insults him and Homer finds out he's the "flavor of the month". He tries to make himself more relevant so he shows up during a Penn and Teller magic act, Teller accidentally talks and says there have been multiple Tellers. Maggie is watching The Happy Little Elves but Homer switches over to Access Springfield, they call him "yesterday's news" and compare him to Fred Flintsone. Homer gets depressed so Marge suggest he talks it over with his life partner, so he goes to Moe's. Homer goes to the top of the Springfield State Building (a spoof on the Empire State Building) and gets in the Jumpers line. He starts talking and the people behind him get tired of waiting so they shove him off. Otto comes along bungee jumping and Homer grabs him. They fall through a hole and spring back up. Homer decides to dedicate his life to his kids. Bart and Lisa don't want his help so he turns his attention to Maggie. When he plays peek-a-boo she tries to escape. He electrocutes himself with the TV. While tossing her in the air she grabs the clothes line and tries to escape again. Homer takes her to swim class but she won't get in the pool. On the way home she points at a butterfly and Homer thinks she wants to go in the ocean. He's carried off by a rip tide and almost drowns so she rescues him. Homer takes Maggie bowling, she gets a perfect strike but he marks her off for stepping over the foul line costing her a perfect game. 

Ron Howard, Penn and Teller, Pat O'Brien and Nancy O'Dell do their own voices.

The song Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh was in the episode Marge Be Not Proud.

Montage as Homer is snoozing, Marge gets up / Bart Steals money out of Homer's pants / Snowball II puts dead bird on the bed, Homer snuggles with it / Otto and his girlfriend sneak in and make out on the bed, she steals money from Homer's wallet. 

Homer is looking at a Where's Waldo on the back of a box of Krusty-O's. He shouts "Waldo where are you?" just as Waldo walks by the kitchen window. 

A guy threatens Moelman with a Details magazine

Krusty Brand Chew Goo Gum-Like Substance. It contains spider eggs and the hantavirus. He's selling the antidote for $5 but gets cut off on the address by Kent Brockman who is reporting on Homer's perfect game. 

At the bowling alley Jacques and Lurleen Lumpkin go by in the background. I should have kept track of the number of times Ruth Powers is in the background. 

When Homer bowls the perfect game it's a spoof on the 1984 movie The Natural complete with the music. 

Homer's List: Before I die I want to - End Crime & Injustice / Bowl a Perfect Game (one check mark) / See Stevie Nicks Naked (checked off three times)

Mrs. Krabappal reads Fear Of Flying a 1973 erotic novel by Erica Jong. 

Celebrities on The Springfield Squares: Rainer Wolfcastle / Krusty / Itchy And Scratchy / Bumblebee Man / Homer / Princess Kashmir / Sideshow Mel / Ron Howard / The Capitol City Goofball. The contestants are Disco Stu and Agnes Skinner.

When wandering around depressed Homer sings This Is The End by The Doors

When Homer and Otto are bungee jumping they go past Morlocks / C.H.U.Ds and finally the Mole People, who are lead by Moleman and his earthquake machine.

Springfield YMCA sign: Daddy And Me Swimming Class -No Stepfathers-

When Maggie rescues Homer the theme from Victory At Sea plays.

Eight Misbehaving

This episode premiered on November 21st 1999. It ran in its regular time slot and opposite Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, Touched By An Angel and Third Watch.

The title comes from the musical Ain't Misbehaving. 

The chalkboard gag is "Indian Burns are not our cultural heritage" (ooo, there's a joke that would get you cancelled in the modern era) and the couch gag is the family sits down but then goes through a revolving hidden door, on the other side is Vincent Price torturing an upside-down Ned chained to the wall.

The family goes to Shøp, a spoof on Ikea. The mascot is Allen Wrench. (He's actually an alien that is being held prisoner by the store). Marge picks out a pencil holder called a Pöpli, Lisa says she hates the Pöpli kids. The store cafeteria is Fud (with an accent mark over the u), the forks are made out of Legos. While at the store they run into Apu and Manjula, who gets excited over holding Maggie. When Apu tells Homer that he's trying to get Manjula pregnant Homer goes into a series of internet comments like Too Much Information and so forth. Apu asks Homer if he took any special steps to get pregnant, Homer laughs at that one, he has them have sex at the makeout point while reading a script, the plan works. They skip ahead 9 months, Bart has learned the true meaning of Columbus Day and winter, Marge did a stint as Sideshow Marge, complete with a bone through her hair, Lisa became the most popular girl in school but became conceited. When Manjula's water breaks at the Kwik-E-Mart Gil has to mop it up. Manjula gives birth to 8 kids, Apu freaks out. Manjula had been on fertility drugs, but Apu was also sneaking them in her food, so did Homer, Marge and Bart. Companies send Apu and Manjula free supplies until a Shelbyville woman gives birth to 9 children, then they take all the stuff back. Homer and Marge drop by to discover the place is a mess and the new parents are exhausted. Larry Kidkill shows up and offers to help Apu by turning the babies into an exhibit at the zoo. Butch Patrick convinces Apu to take the offer. It turns out that Kidkill has an hourly show with the babies, Octopia. The babies are all in costumes from a rock star to a WWI baron. When Apu can't legally get the kids back he and Homer break in to steal them. When Kidkill shows up Homer promises to put on an even better show, it turns out to be him and Butch Patrick riding a tricycle through cobras. Homer then calls for the mongoose, which attacks him. He shouts out in pain, and tells people to come see the next show at 8.

This episode is based on the story of the Dionne Quintuplets. After their birth the Canadian government took control of them and basically turned them into a sideshow until they were 18.

Gary Marshall does the voice of Larry Kidkill. Butch Patrick does his own voice. 

Pee 'N' See Home Pregnancy Test. Baby, Baby, Lemon / Baby, Baby, Pirate (pirates are wild so that means Manjula is pregnant.

Springfield Shopper headline: Nahasapeemapetilan-Tastic!

Pepsi-B For Export Only.

There is a picture of Babar in the background of Apu's apartment.

Homer is playing with a View-Master. He's looking at the Hansel and Gretel story. 

Zoo sign: Octo Sapiens. From The Collection of Apu and Manjula.

Kidkill introduces 4 of the kids but then says "and the rest", this is a spoof on the first season theme song from Gilligan's Island.

Kidkill pays off Wiggum in peanuts.

When Homer and Apu escape with the kids a gorilla is at the gate trying to get them to take her baby. This is a dark twist on the U.S. escaping during the collapse of Hanoi and mother's trying to pass their kids over the fence. 

Homer's show song is Highway To The Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins.

This was one of those weird Drop The Cow episodes where they didn't really have an ending, so they kind of made something up. It's not one of my favorites.

Take My Wife, Sleaze

This episode premiered on November 28th, 1999. It ran in its usual time slot and opposite the regular programs. The Disney movie was The Santa Clause

The title of this episode comes from the classic punchline from Henny Youngman, "Take my wife, please".

The chalkboard gag is "I can't see dead people" and the couch gag is a repeat of the shredder.

The family sees a commercial for a 50's retro cafe, they all want to go tonight but Homer says "eh, we'll go next month", cut to 30 days later. The diner has a dance contest for a vintage 1955 Harley Davidson. Homer and Marge enter and go nuts on the dance floor and win. It turns out Homer doesn't know how to ride a motorcycle, Bart laughs at him for a couple of days until Homer asks for a lesson. Homer takes the bike to church and keeps revving the engine until Lovejoy gives up. Homer sees a movie about a teen rebel and decides to form a biker gang, The Hell's Satans. They mock Wiggum and then pitch pennies at the Kwik-E-Mart until Apu threatens them with a broom. Homer sends in a photo of Marge asleep to a biker magazine. The real Hell's Satans show up and force Homer to eat his club jacket. The gang takes over the house, since Homer insulted Wiggum he refuses to help. Homer decides to stand up to them but they've left, and taken Marge. Homer searches for her but they are heading to the biker rally in South Dakota. Marge teaches the gang how to write resumes and get a job. As they are going straight Homer shows up and attacks them. Meathook, the gang leader, challenges Homer to a fight in the circle of death, Homer wins. The credits run under a live video of NRBQ playing the theme song. 

John Goodman does the voice of Meathook, Henry Winkler does the voice of Ramrod. Jay North does his own voice. 

The chalkboard gag is a reference to the 1999 film The Sixth Sense

The family is watching The Guinness Book Of World Records. A man with the least amount of faces, none " help me" / smelliest tumor / dog who can't predict anything / contents of a super model's stomach / three other things. Lisa complains about the show.

There is a commercial for the 50's retro Greaser's Cafe. Wolfguy Jack (a spoof on Wolfman Jack) "Remember television, Coca Cola and Dick Clark?" "Where every day is 1955, actual year may vary, consult current calendar" (Dick Clark was still alive in 1999 and doing Rockin' New Years Eve) Headlines on cafe walls: Herald Tribune: Milkshakes Popular / Beatles Unite / Study: Teens Rarely Pregnant / Hula Hoop Mishap Kills 3 / We All Agree, Conformist Is Best! / Vietnam Situation Solved! / Photo of Ike. Lenny goes to the restroom, one door is marked Cool Cats and the other Squares, he walks in to Cool Cats and all the ladies scream so he goes to Squares and they scream again. The menu has an Alan Ginsburger / Unamerican cheese sandwich / Polio dogs. "Lets spin more platters at Greasy's Cafe where the 50's are never going away", the place is closed down three days later.

The 50's cafe has Meet Jay North, The Original Dennis The Menace. In the episode Cape Feare Bart calls himself this century's Dennis The Menace and in Two Bad Neighbors they do a spoof on the Dennis The Menace storyline. 

The model showing the dance contest motorcycle is Debby (Candy Clark) from the 1973 movie American Graffiti. 

The dance contest uses Mental House Rock by Johnny Bobby, it's an original Simpsons song and is sung by Hank Azaria. Main characters in the dance contest: Homer and Marge / Skinner and Mrs. Krabappal / The Wiggums / Apu and Manjula

First Church Of Springfield sing Today's Topic: There's Something About The Virgin Mary (a reference to the 1998 movie There's Something About Mary)

Homer's biker gang is the Hell's Satans, the members are Moe, Lenny, Carl and Ned (because he lets them use his rumpus room as their headquarters). Homer has a Harley, Moe an old Indian, Carl a scooter he rented from Hertz, Ned on a bicycle and Lenny on a riding mower. 

Among the things Homer has printed Hell's Satans on are Pogs.

Homer visits a biker bar, Poppa Wheelie's, Ladies Puke Free.

The bikers play Me And The Boys by NRBQ

The bikers are heading to Crystal Lake campground. This is the camp from the 1980 horror movie Friday The 13th.

The Homer vs. Meathook fight is a spoof on classic Hollywood sword fights. 

This episode got a bit out of hand. Marge suddenly convincing a biker gang to go legit and there is a fight with Homer and Meathook swinging full size motorcycles like swords. It was extremely cartoonish, and not in a good way. When I said I was heading into the bad years of The Simpsons these were the episodes I was talking about.

Grift of the Magi

This episode premiered on December 19th 1999. It ran in its usual time slot and opposite the ABC Big Picture Show (Babe), Touched By An Angel and Dateline NBC. 

The title of this episode came from the O Henry story The Gift Of The Magi.

The chalkboard gag is "I will not sell my kidney on eBay" and the couch gag is the family sliding in on a fireman's pole, except for Homer who gets stuck between floors.

Milhouse is being chased by a hole in the ozone and winds up at the Simpson's house. He and Bart are bored so they dress up in Marge's clothes and wigs and jump on the bed. Homer shows up and yells at them but Milhouse says they are drunk. Bart falls on a bowling ball and cracks his coccyx and has to wear a butt cast. He goes to school in a wheelchair but the elementary school doesn't have a handicapped ramp. Fat Tony shows up and builds multiple ramps but by the time they are done Bart is healed, and then the ramps collapse because it's made from breadsticks. Fat Tony presents a bill for $200,000 which the school is forced to pay and has to close due to a lack of funding, all the kids are happy but the parents are upset. The school holds a play to convince Mr. Burns to donate money, all the kids play stupid and can't save Mr. Burns. The school is bought by Kid First Industries and they fire all the teachers. The new teacher, Jim Hope, asks the kids what they like in a toy, behind the chalkboard is a camera and a recorder to find out what the kids responses are. Lisa gets in trouble for studying and is writing her punishment on the chalkboard. Bart turns off the classroom light and Lisa sees light coming from behind the board and discovers the research lab. A robot toy comes out and asks for a hug. Lisa brings Wiggum to the school to show them the broom closet, Homer asks if it's like a horror movie where they open the door to discover a broom closet but then a hidden evil robot murders them all, when they open the door it's just a broom closet. During the Krusty special Lisa sees Funzo, the new Christmas toy that was created by the research done at the school. Bart and Lisa break into the toy company, Gary Coleman is the security guard and is on the phone arguing with the Chinese restaurant, even though the phone isn't plugged in. The toy company tells Lisa they did it for the children, and they give Bart a free Funzo, he goes through the catalog and wants to order all the expensive accessories. Funzo starts trashing all the other toys. The kids convince Homer to break into everyone's house and steal the Funzos while they carol at the front door. They haul the toys to the tire fire and toss them in. Gary Coleman shows up and they discuss the evil toy company. After talking all night they invite Coleman to dinner. The show does a narration about what other people did during Christmas, Burns is visited by three ghosts and donates money to the school. Moe sees what the world would be like without him and brings a goose to dinner. 

Tim Robbins does the voice of Jim Hope, the toy company researcher. Gary Coleman does his own voice. Clarence Clemons (best known as the sax player in the E Street Band) does the voice of the narrator.

Funzo was based on the Furby toys and the idea of the mass hysteria over the must have present every Christmas. 

In reference to the chalkboard gag, eBay had launched as an on line auction site in 1995. They had officially changed the name to eBay in 1997. It is illegal to sell body parts on the site.

Simpsons games, Clam Traffic Jam / County Seats.

Bart and Milhouse sing Sisters Are Doing It For Themselves by the Eurythmics

The name of Fat Tony's construction company is Valdazzo Brothers Olive Oil. This is a spoof on the Genco Olive Oil company in The Godfather and the Valdez oil disaster.

Bart and Lisa watch Donde Esta Justice. Bumblebee Man is the judge and the case is a car dealer that sold a woman a bad car.

Second chalkboard gag, the research teacher finds out that Lisa is doing actual school work, she's punished by having to write "I will not do math in class"

The sign on the door hiding the toy company's recording devices: Danger! Broom Closet.

Krusty holds his nodenominational fun fest with Tea Leoni, Beck, The Dixie Chicks and Patrick Ewing as the genie. The Dixie Chicks would change their name to just The Chicks during the Woke movement. Patrick Ewing as the genie is a spoof on the 1996 movie Kazaam starring Shaquille O'Neal. 

Kids First Industries Secret Headquarters (in flashing neon red)

In his later years Gary Coleman worked as a security guard including a famous incident where he jumped on the hood of the car of a group of paparazzi. 

This is another episode that doesn't have a real ending so they just tacked on some Christmas stuff and called it good.

This was the last episode of 1999 and the last episode of the 20th century (Unless you're Neal DeGrasse Tyson and then the last of the 20th century will be in December of 2000).  As we move into the new millennia we have to wonder, what lies ahead, what marvels await us? Will there be flying cars? Will we have self adjusting clothes like in the movie Back To The Future II? Will there ever be a final Simpsons episode? I guess we'll see.