The Simpsons 296-300

Helter Shelter

This episode premiered on December 1st 2002. The lead in show was King Of The Hill and it was followed by That 70's Show. It ran opposite The W.W.O. Disney (Pinocchio), Becker and American Dream.

The title of the episode comes from the 1968 song Helter Skelter by The Beatles.

The chalkboard gag is "Milhouse did not test cootie positive" and the couch gag is a cursor comes on screen, moving Homer to the other side of the couch, changes the wall color to green and the sailboat painting to the Mona Lisa.

A conduit pipe falls on Homer at work and although he could sue for millions Burns gives him skybox tickets instead. The family thinks they are going to a basketball game but it's hockey. When the guys in the regular seats try to climb up and attack Homer he dumps hot fudge on them. Lisa complains about the family enjoying the skybox luxuries so she goes to the floor, she gives some advice to the players and they score, he gives her his hockey stick however it's full of termites. The house gets tented for fumigation, the bullies think it's a circus so they sneak in and pass out, but are saved by the exterminator. The house will be uninhabitable for 6 months. The family can't find a room because the bran convention is in town so they try staying with Lenny. He has a great apartment but he shares a wall with a Jai Alai court. Next they try Comic Book Guy's place but he's holding an imaginary intergalactic meeting with cardboard cutouts. They try to stay in a booth at Moe's but Maggie gets drunk on the fumes, and she's a mean drunk. Barney suggests they try a realty show where you live in a house from 1895. The first test family is Bill Cosby (a joke that didn't age well). The producers love how the Simpsons fall apart over nothing. When they show the family the confession room Marge rushes in to confess her hair isn't really blue. It takes Marge 6 hours to make breakfast and Homer cuts himself with a straight razor. The family drives to the Kwik-E-Mart in a coal fired car. Apu can only sell them items available in 1895, which doesn't include Earkel O's. The family is miserable but Homer tells them they are on TV and have to overcome. Bart sends a telegram to Moe "Heywood U. Cuddlemee". The family adapts to their lifestyle and the ratings decline so the executive bring in Squiggy. The network then drops the house in a river and after it goes over the falls everything is destroyed, Squiggy is dead. The family stumbles across a lost tribe from another reality show. The people decide to overpower the current reality show crew and steal their helicopter. Homer is about to smash the helicopter but instead gets squished under a boulder. The family goes home and watches scripted TV. They are bored with what's on so they go outside to watch Homer drink from the hose, which Bart keeps turning on and off so Homer gets sprayed.

This was the last episode to use an ink and paint method. From the next episode on it will be done digitally.

David Landers does his own voice (as the character of Squiggy from Lavern and Shirley) and Larry Holmes does his own voice. 

The plot of this episode is based on the 2002 PBS series Manor House in which modern people try to live like the year 1900.

The Springfield stadium is now the Gee Your Hair Smells Terrific Arena. This was a brand of shampoo in the 80's that would leave a lingering odor in your hair. Currently it is only available in the Philippines. 

After being hit with the pipe Homer says he lost 20% of his brain function and then trails off into a series of sounds. Is this another Simpson Prediction about the current mental state of Donald Trump?

The stadium has two entrances, Skybox Entrance and Schnook Entrance.

Bart has a painting done punching Larry Holmes.

A Bug's Death Exterminator (This is a spoof on A Bug's Life complete with the image of a dead ant)

The exterminator uses the good poison, with James Coburn on the label.

When the Simpsons can't go back in their house they hang out by the front curb and the King Of The Hill opening credits montage plays. 

The family tries to check into Yee Olde Off-Ramp Inn. It was first seen in the episode Homer's Night Out.

Posters at the Reality Channel studio: Sucker Punch / Mystery Injection / Tied To A Bear 

Self Aware Joke: The producer of The 1895 Channel says she doesn't want a family that has been on TV forever. The Simpsons had reached its 13th year, and is still on 22 years later. 

Marge confesses her hair isn't really blue, in the episode Secrets Of A Successful Marriage Homer revealed that she's grey as a mule and has been dying it blue for years.

Law and Order: Elevator Inspectors Unit.

The Great Louse Detective

This episode premiered on December 15th 2002. The lead in show was the NFL Postgame Show and it was followed by King Of The Hill. It ran opposite The W.W.O. Disney (Nancy Drew), Becker and American Dreams.

The title of the episode comes from the Disney film The Great Mouse Detective

The couch gag is when Homer clicks the remote the family is transported back in time, first to caveman days when they watch a fire and then Ancient Rome where they watch a gladiator battle and then back to the present day.

Marge is timing herself cleaning the house but sucks up Maggie in the vacuum. The family is invited to a free weekend at Stagnant Springs Spa. The kids go to Dr. Mas-Seuss. An Asian woman walking on Homer's back sinks into his fat. When Homer is in the steam room someone cranks up the heat to Murder level and jambs the door with a wrench, he is saved when Krusty comes along. To solve the attempted murder they go to Sideshow Bob. In exchange for his help Wiggum offers Bob his choice of rolls in the prison musical Man Of La Mancha. To catch the killer the prison lets Sideshow Bob go home with the Simpsons, and tape a shock monitor to his leg. Bob wants to follow Homer through a normal day so they go on gliders, Homer just wanted to impress Bob. They head to the Kwik-E-Mart where they find out it's two weeks until Mardi Gras. Juniors Garage (foreshadowing) tows off Homer's car after he crashes it. Bob sets up a Homer dummy on a pulley loop to attract the killer. First Moe attacks then Patty and Selma, Willie, Reverend Lovejoy and then Homer attack his own dummy. While playing darts at Moe's Bob throws them in the pattern of Bart's face and then hits it between the eyes. The bar crowd mocks Bob for not being able to kill Bart. The door opens and someone takes a shot at Homer, but hits the pickled egg jar. (When the door swings closed we can see the back of a tow truck, foreshadowing). Marge shocks Bob but the button gets stuck. Bob tells Homer to stay out of site but he's elected King of Mardi Gras. Bob realizes that the killer stuffed the voting box but Homer wants to go anyhow. Homer hears gunshots and gets scared but it's just Fat Tony killing a guy. The police tell Bob that a mechanic tuned up the float before the parade, he puts the clues together, the wrench through the sauna door, a greasy smudge on the invitation, and realizes that the tow truck driver cut the break line. Homer asks people to help slow him down but they fail. Bob shoots himself out of a cannon and grabs the Duff blimp and pulls Homer off the float before he crashes into the swordfish museum. Just then Grimes Jr., on stilts, shoots Duffman who is flying the blimp. Homer and Bob drop down onto the bullies and steal their stilts, they corner Grimes Jr. in an alley. The police show up to hall off Grimes Jr and then shoot Bob with a tranq dart. Bob manages to escape and plans to kill Bart but he just can't do it, then sings Accustom To His Face from My Fair Lady. Bob is about to run away but a couple of birds have found his shock button and are standing on it. 

The Roman scene in the couch gag is a spoof on the 2000 film Gladiator.

Homer has the George Forman Mail Sorter, it puts the Visa Bill, Jury Summons and an invitation to Patty And Selma's birthday party in the Bad pile. 

Stagnant Springs Health Spa. Follow The Smell

Bart plans to throw a Baby Ruth in the resort hot springs. This is a spoof on the pool scene from the 1980 movie Caddyshack.

When Marge asks what position the down on all fours is the yoga instructor says "The American Taxpayer, the taxpayer" and then does a golf swing. This is a spoof on Johnny Carson. 

Springfield Prison is now called Campbell's Chunky Soup Maximum Security Prison.

When Marge says they shouldn't have brought the kids to a maximum security prison Lisa says "It still beats Disney's California Adventure". The Simpsons is now owned by Disney and I'm watching this on Disney +

Sign at prison warden's door "shhh! Backroom deal in progress"

Self Aware Joke: Bart says Sideshow Bob tried to kill him in so many ways that it isn't funny anymore. 

Potential suspects in the attempted murder, Mr Burns / Fat Tony / The Emperor of Japan (thirty minutes over Tokyo) / ex President Bush (Two Bad Neighbors) / the late Frank Grimes (Homer's Enemy, foreshadowing) / PBS (Missionary: Impossible) / Stephen Hawking (They Saved Lisa's Brain) / the fat little Dixie Chick / the state of Florida (Kill The Alligator And Run)

Homer buys a copy of Juggs and Ammo. A Larry Flynt Publication. Then he crashes the car while trying to read it while driving.

Homer's car comes from Croatia and is mostly built from discarded tank parts.

When Moe is looking at the photos of him with his shot pickle jar Memory by Barbara Streisand plays.

Bob watches That 30's Show. This is a spoof on That 70's Show which had followed The Simpsons on several occasions. 

Lenny is from Chicago.

During the stilt walker chase scene classic 70's detective show music plays.

The alley is closed off by Sanderson's High Brick Walls "No one builds 'em higher"

Lisa claims she solved the case but her note says Bumblebee Man.

This episode has perhaps the biggest continuity error, Frank Grimes jr. is around the same age as Frank Grimes, which is biologically impossible. 

This was the last episode of 2002. Only 22 more years to go, hopefully.

Special Edna

This episode premiered on January 5th 2003. The lead in show was the NFC Wildcard Post Game Show and it was followed by King Of The Hill. It ran opposite the ABC Sunday Night Movie (Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, 1971 version), Becker and American Dreams.

The title is a spoof on Special Education

There is no chalkboard gag and the couch gag is the family is dropped into a fast food deep frier, dumped out on the couch and salted.

The kids are given an assignment to write a report about WWI but don't know anything about history, except for Martin. Every time he makes a suggestion Nelson beats him up, and is finally thrown out the window. Mrs. Krabappal wanted to go apple picking but Skinner's mother had a neck wattle accident so he cancels. Bart goes to the library to read a book on the war but a guy paid for 99 copies when he only needed one, Bart makes 99 copies of his butt, which he slips into the prayer books at church on Sunday morning. He then tries to concentrate on his paper but Milhouse shows up, his uncle stole a Blackhawk helicopter from the military and wants to take them on a joyride. After 30 days Bart has written the headline of his paper and put his name on it, but nothing else, he asks Grandpa who then tells him about how he joined the army when he was two. Bart gets an F and is told to redo the paper after class, he gives an oral report. Skinner comes in to talk to Edna but his mother calls and he leaves, Bart suggests they go out. He tells the family about how sad Edna is so Lisa suggest Bart nominate her for Teacher of the Year. When the Teacher committee finds out that Bart Simpson is a real kid and Krabappel is his teacher she is nominated as a finalist. Meanwhile Nelson is nominated as Bully Of The Year. At the press conference Krabappel thanks Bart, Skinner starts to worry that she may get a job at a better school so he goes to praise her, but his mother pages him. The family gets to go to Orlando to attend the ceremonies, they list off multiple theme parks including Leisure World and Gator Gulch but are disappointed to find out they're going to EFCOT (This isn't a typo, that is how they spell the name of the park in this episode). Skinner realizes he's made a mistake and heads to Florida. He shows up during the fireworks show, but brought his mother along. Skinner finds out that the winner of Teacher Of The Year gets a cash prize so they never have to teach again, he enlists Bart to help him sabotage Edna. Skinner tells Bart he'll dispel the Teacher's Pet rumor so Bart agrees, Skinner then flashes back to Vietnam where he stole a cupcake from the Officer's Tent. The students who nominated the teacher get to ask the last question in the competition, Bart's question is "What would you most like to teach the world" but he pretends he can't read. Skinner confesses to setting up the scheme and decides to stop listening to his mother, he then asks Edna to marry him and Little Richard gives him a ring to give to her. Julio Estudiante wins. Homer crawls over the wall to Disney World where a churro is $14. (Another Simpson prediction about the future). During the credits Homer is eating a pie and liking it so much he starts singing about it but walks off screen and the song cuts off. Edna asks if they should follow him and Marge says "I'm on vacation"

Little Richard does his own voice in this episode.

Bart watches wrestling, Uncles Sam and Colin Ka-Pow vs. Osama bin Rotten. (This episode was 3 years after the 9/11 attack and 7 years before Seal Team 6 would kill bin Laden)

First Church Of Springfield sign: Welcome Pissed Off Catholics.

Bart includes 6 pages of ads in his 10 page report on WWI (why didn't I think of that?): Moe's Tavern "we check ID's (with a picture of Moe winking) / Kwik-E-Mart / Costington's Shoe Sale / Herman's Military Antiques / Graduation Rings / Android Dungeon and (something) Card Shop / Krusty the Clown

Springfield IMAX Theater: Nature's Biggest Holes. The documentary is narrated by Wolfcastle (I miss Troy McClure).

When Lisa finds out Bart went to the movies with Krabappel she asks "what happened to the Bart who put the mothballs in the beef stew". This comes from a line in the 1990 song Do The Bartman

"It wasn't long ago, just a couple of weeks,
I got in trouble, yeah, pretty deep.
Homer was yellin',
Bart!
Mom was too,
Because I put mothballs in the beef stew."

There are two buildings, Teacher Of The Year Foundation and next door is the Substitute Teacher Of The Year Foundation except the building is covered in graffiti, vandalized and on fire. 

One of the Teacher Of The Year nomination videos is a guy doing Robin William's Dead Poet's Society from the 1989 film. One of the judges comments that the movie destroyed teaching.

Cletus is the reporter for the Outhouse Times-Picayune.

Dated reference: Skinner gets paged by his mother, remember pagers? The message is "Fridge too loud"

The Simpsons go to Efcot Center (a spoof on EPCOT) and make fun of Disney, which now owns the show.

EFCOT Center: When Everything Else Is Booked. The Futuresphere, "It's what people in 1965 imagined the world would look like in 1987" The ride features the world taken over by Eastern Airlines that uses robots to enslave humanity while Happy Together by The Turtles plays. 

The Electric Car Of The Future ride is a spoof on Disney's Ford Magic Skyway ride from the 1964 Worlds Fair. The ride is sponsored by the Gasoline Produces of America and the animatronics make fun of the guests for driving a Gay car.

Springfield Shopper Headlines: Teacher Nominated For Award, Will She Leave Old Life Behind? / Closed Pistachio Styles Fatso (with a photo of Comic Book Guy)

Orlando is 2653 miles away from Springfield. That's equivalent to driving from Los Angeles to Orlando, part of the running gag about the locations of the Simpson's home town.

The family goes to an international restaurant at the World Showcase. The menu features La Pizza, Der Hamburger and Señor Grilled Cheese. 

Bart and Homer go to see Honey, I Squirted Goo On The Audience. This is a spoof on the Disney World show Honey, I Shrunk The Audience and the Nickelodeon Studios Attraction at Universal Studios. Nickelodeon Studios closed in 1998 and Honey closed in 2010.

Marge and Homer go to see Great Moments With Mr. Eisner. This is a spoof on Great Moments With Mr. Lincoln and Michael Eisner who was CEO of Disney from 1984 to 2005.

Marge, Homer and Skinner go on the ENRON's Ride Of Broken Dreams. ENRON went bankrupt in 2001. The ride is a roller coaster of their stock history.

Lisa and Marge go to see The Home Of Tomorrow. It's based on the Monsanto House Of The Future that was an attraction at Disneyland from 1957 to 1967. They spot Skinner sleeping in one of the beds. 

Bart is playing Halloween Hit And Run. Among the kid targets are Charlie Brown as a ghost and Lucy in the witch mask. Larry The Looter and Shark Bait are in the background. 

Tonight "Teacher Of The Year" Awards. Tickets Very Available.

Julio Estudiante is based on Jamie Escalante from the 1988 movie Stand And Deliver. (Estudiante is Spanish for Student, in case you didn't figure that one out.

The end credit scene came out a year before the movie The Pirates Of The Caribbean that featured an end credit scene.

This episode aired 16 years before Disney took over 21st Century Fox and The Simpsons became part of their entertainment empire.

The Dad That Knew Too Little

This episode premiered on January 12th 2003. The lead in and following shows were King Of The Hill. It ran opposite The W.W.O. Disney (101 Dalmatians), 60 Minutes and American Dreams. 

The title comes from the 1956 movie The Man Who Knew Too Much

The couch gag is the family is in black and white and lowered on a girder to the TV where they eat their lunch.

The Simpsons are watching Padz, a show about the houses of Springfield celebrities. The episode is about Krusty but he didn't know they were showing up so he's hung over. During the tour Elliott Gould comes over to complain that Mr. Teenie bit his kid. A commercial comes on for the Turbo Diary and Lisa instantly wants one. Homer and Bart head to the mall where Homer gorges himself on the free samples in the food court. By the time they get to the store the diaries are sold out. Flanders is getting a movie of Rod, one of those where you add the kids photo and name and the computer does the rest, Homer decides to get one for Lisa but the photo is terrible and he gets all the facts wrong. At her birthday Lisa starts crying and runs off. Homer tries to get to know Lisa but she rejects him. Moe convinces Homer to hire a detective to find out more about Lisa. the detective investigates the school and messes up Skinners papers, including stapling them to force Skinner to let him see Lisa's permanent record. Nelson steals Lisa's book report on The Secret Garden in exchange for his photo with Snow White. With the detective's information Homer plays Lisa's favorite album, takes her to an animal testing lab protest and the Museum of Sadness And Oppression. The detective charges Homer a $1000 in expenses but Homer runs off without paying. The next day there is a news story on a protest group breaking into the animal testing lab, trashing the place and freeing the animals. The cops find a Malibu Stacy scrunchy, a saxophone reed and Lisa's book report at the lab. Ralph shows up at the door and asks for Lisa to come out to play, with her hands up, Homer grabs Lisa and crashes through the garage door resulting in a high speed chase with the police. To distract Marge from the fact that Homer and Lisa ran off Bart throws his spaghetti into the ceiling fan making a huge mess. When checking into a motel Homer says his name is Rock Strongo, the clerk doesn't believe him so he says his name is Lance Uppercut and this works. The cops have tapped the family phone and trace the call to the motel. Homer finally confesses that he hired a detective, Lisa gets mad. The cops show up but Lisa and Homer escape through the window, they discover the stolen animals from the lab are at a circus. The detective threatens to shoot them with the man in the cannon but Homer pushes Lisa out of the way and takes the shot. They then up into the hall of mirrors, Homer laughs and says "You can't shoot all of us" but Dexter shoots him in the arm. Lisa shows up and uses the laser pointed Bart gave her for her birthday to blind the detective. The cops arrest Dexter for trashing the lab and framing Lisa. The animals wind up at Cleatus's house. In the credit scene Lisa gets her diary, Bart steals it and asks Homer to read him a bedtime story, Homer opens it and is shocked by the anti theft device. 

Elliott Gould does his own voice in this episode.

The couch gag is a spoof on the 1932 photo Lunch Atop A Skyscraper. The actual photographer is unknown.

Padz is a spoof on MTV's show Cribs. Dredric Tatum, Rainer Wolfcastle and Kent Brockman are in the opening credits.

Photos on Krusty's wall: Bette Midler (Krusty Gets Kancelled), Richard Nixon (a spoof on Elvis), a fake Body at the beach / Clown College degree / Sideshow Mel / A gold record, probably for Krustophina from Behind the Laughter.

When Gould beats up Krusty he says "Say hello to Bob, and Ted, and Carol, and Alice", this is a reference to the 1969 movie.

The Turbo Diary is based on the Girl Tech Password Journal.

Springfield Mall: Now Disney Store-Free! Disney Stores launched in 1987 and peaked in 2001. Today Disney licenses the name out to third party retailers. 

The Tickle Me Krusty, most popular toy of 1999: "I'm anatomically correct. Go ahead, take a peek / I wonder what mommy's medicine tastes like."

Mall stores: Elvis's Pretzels / Taste Of China / Buns / Shish K-Bobs / Toys / Mug On A Mug / Put A Swear On A Hat / Kumbersome Key-Chains / Make Your Child A Movie Star / Another Damn Candle Cart

Moe had a cow heart transplant 

The detective's business card: Dexter Colt Private Investigator KL5-5141. His door sign: Dexter Colt Private Investigator. Please, No Set-ups. Framed newspaper on his wall: Drunk Cop Fired From Force (with the new digital ink and paint cels the headline stands out while the copy is blurred) however the story he saved it for is about Private Eye Wins Bake-Off (there is a photo of him holding a pie)

Dexter Colt is based on Robert Mitchum and the classic Noir films of the 40's and 50's.

Signs on the bad side of town: Bail / Easy Hotel / Pawn / Hard Luck Cafe (a spoof on the Hard Rock Cafe) / Hangover Hamlet / Neon Signs 

Homer's email is chunkylover53@aol but it was hacked and used to spread viruses to computers so it's best to not write to them.

Lisa is a member of P.T.E.T.A, Pre-Teems for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, her favorite album is Miles Davis-Birth Of The Cool.

Officer Lou's ex was was named Amy.

During the high speed chase Homer turns down a road with a sign that says "Bridge Out" however the bridge is intact and when Lou pulls down the branch they see the entire sign that says Bridge Outstanding! -Overpass Monthly.

Continuity detail. A shot of the Simpsons house shows some boards nailed up over where Homer drove through the garage door.

When they dye their hair as a disguise Lisa says she looks like like a Powerpuff Girl. The show premiered in 1998.

Homer checks into the Three Seasons Motel, a spoof on the Four Seasons Inn

Homer getting shot by the guy in the cannon is a reference to the episode Homerpalooza.

The Strong Arms Of The Ma

This episode premiered on February 2nd 2003. The lead in show was King of the Hill and was followed by a rerun of The Simpsons (Large Marge). It ran opposite the NFL Pro Bowl (AFC 45 - NFC 20), Becker and American Dreams

The title comes from the expression The Long Arm Of The Law

The chalkboard gag is "The school does not need a "Regime Change" and the couch gag is the family puts their heads through a photo backdrop. Lisa's head is on Homer's body, Homer on Marge, Maggie on Lisa, Bart on Maggie and Marge on Bart. A photographer takes their picture.

The family goes to Rainer Wolfcastle's bankruptcy sale, Homer buys the actor's first weight set. Lisa buys a Van Gogh. Bart buys a cyber head. On the way home Maggie has an "accident" so Marge goes to the Kwik-E-Mart to change her. The restroom is disguised as a High Voltage Room. A guy in a Goofy hat robs Marge, stealing her pearls, she breaks down crying. She starts to panic when she goes out, pepper sprays Ralph and develops agoraphobia. To try to help Marge they wheel her out to the mailbox but a wasp starts circling around so Homer sets fire to the nest and they all have to run back into the house. Homer builds a set of the Kwik-E-Mart so Marge will get use to going there, Bart dressed up like Apu, however Milhouse comes in with a gun claiming to be a robber and she runs to the basement. The family brings a walkie talkie to church so Marge can participate. The family is eating dinner in the basement since Marge can't come upstairs anymore. Marge gets bored and starts working out with the weight set. When Marge is cooking she needs a lemon and runs upstairs to pick a lemon off the lemon tree. She realizes she's not afraid anymore and goes running around town. She runs into the burglar and beats him up, Wiggum wants to know why the rest of the town doesn't catch the criminals that robbed them. Marge runs into Ruth Powers, who is now buff after a stint in prison. Powers convinces Marge to use steroids to build up even more muscle. When Otto takes off without the kids Marge chases him down and lifts the bus. Marge decides to "snuggle" with Homer even though he doesn't want to. As her talent in the body building competition Marge pulls a bus with her teeth, she comes in Second. She decides to increase her workout and scares everyone at the bar. Moe insults her and she attacks him with a broken pickled egg jar. A fight breaks out and she beats everyone up including a group of sailors. Homer talks her down from her roid rage, Moe decides to torch the bar to recoup his losses but Carl points out he doesn't have insurance. When they go home marge throws the weight set into the furnace. 

Pamela Reed returns to do the voice of Ruth Powers. Although Powers had been in the background of crowd shots throughout the series this was the first time the character spoke since the episode Marge On The Lamb in 1993.

Eye On Springfield. The last time the show appeared on The Simpsons was in the episode My Sister My Sitter.

Items at Rainer Wolfcastle's yard sale: Golden Globes "50¢ a pound". Sword everything, Homer eats the sword pie. Bart buys a cyber head, this is a spoof on the Terminator movies. Homer buys a Powersauce bulk pack (King Of The Hill)

Wolfcastle was in a movie with Rob Schnider, My Baby Is An Ugly Man.

The crackhouse across the street from the Kwik-E-Mart has a sign that says "Restrooms are for crack customers only"

The mailman gets trapped under Marge's car but she can't go outside and help him so he decides to read Twilight Zone Magazine, but breaks his glasses. This is a spoof on the 1959 episode Time Enough At Last.

To help Marge Dr. Hibbert gives her a Lifetime movie "The Woman Who Died In Her Home"

First Church Of Springfield sign: No Outside Eucharist.

The Olmec head is back in the basement. It first appeared in the episode Blood Feud. Homer's Santa suit from Simpsons Roasting On An Open Fire is also hanging on the wall.

Marge beating up the crook is a spoof on The Godfather scene where Sonny beats up Carlo on the street.

When Marge works out the theme from Rocky plays. 

Marge and Ruth go to Let's Hear It For The Soy juice bar. The name is a spoof on the 1984 song Let's Hear It For The Boy.

Ruth gives Marge steroids, Ragin' 'Roids 

Marge's bumper stickers, Moms Against Meth / Just say No / I'm Anti-Crank And I Vote / D.A.R.E. / Talk to your kids about HUFFING. Her license plate is EABF 04, this was the production code of this episode.

When Marge chugs the steroids the Popeye The Sailor Man song plays, and her eyes turn green like The Hulk.

Women's Bodybuilding Finals. First Two Rows May Get Oily

After the bar fight when the beaten up guys are laying all over the music from Platoon starts playing in a spoof on the post attack scene.

Continuity error, Ruth Powers suggests that she was in prison for at least three years but she's been popping up in crowd scenes on a regular basis.

I'm pretty sure I never saw the last two episodes before, or if I did they were just on in the background and I wasn't paying attention.

Look at that, I've reached an even 300. I figure I would have given up by now. Only 475 (so far) to go. I've gone deep down the Simpsons rabbit hole and yet I can still see the light from above. Time to delve even deeper.

 The Simpsons 291-295

Poppa's Got A Brand New Badge

This episode premiered on May 22nd, 2002, a rare Wednesday showing. It was the lead in program for the night and was followed by Celebrity Boxing. It ran opposite My Wife And Kids, the 37th annual Academy Of Country Music Awards and Most Outrageous Game Show Moments.

The title comes from the Jame Brown song Papa's Got A Brand New Bag.

The plot of the episode is based on the 1982 movie Kuffs.

The couch gag is a repeat of the Blue Man Group.

Springfield is suffering through a heat wave, the number of air conditioners are draining power and the nuclear plant is at full capacity. In order to make the house feel cooler Homer plugs in a dancing Santa but causes a blackout. Lenny and Carl crash into Costington's and set off a riot. Quimby announces he's going to form a Blue Ribbon Committee so everyone is happy. Someone stole Lisa's Malibu Stacey dolls so Homer decides track them down. He finds Jimbo's cap outside the window. He heads to the hat shop and catches Jimbo trying to buy a new one. At the Kwik-E-Mart he throws nacho cheese onto Snake to prevent  a robbery, the thrill of stopping a crime inspires Homer to starts a private police force, SpringShield. Homer recruits Lenny and Carl to be in his force. Quimby is doing a live press conference to promote the police but catches Wiggum trying to shoot a piñata with a shotgun. Wiggum is fired and Quimby announces that all police duties are being turned over to SpringShield. The mob is making fake poodles out of ferrets, Homer raids his club and arrests them. Fat Tony calls the radio station to say he'll shoot Homer tomorrow, and request Radar Love. Homer tries to recruit help at church but nobody volunteers. Homer shows up to face the mob but before they shoot someone shoots them in their shoulders. Homer decides to give away the badge to the first person who shows up, it's Wiggum. It turns out Maggie has a rifle hidden under her mattress and was the mysterious shooter.

This was the last episode of the 13th season. Although Matt Groening hinted that he was going to end the series, due to budget restraints and network interference, the show would continue for another two decades. 

Springfield Shopper Headline: Heatwave Continues (the ink melts off the page)

The episodes opens with Rossini's William Tell Overture until a flower wilts from the heat.

The elderly are all pretending to be dead so they can stay at the air conditioned morgue.

The school installs an air conditioner and all the kids show up including Jughead, Fat Albert and Fonzie.

Therminator Air Conditioner settings: Glasgow Winter / Well-Digger's Bum / Witch's Teat

Willie says "We're wasting more energy than Ricky Martin's girlfriend, hey-ooo" Martin finally admitted he was Gay in 2010.

Homer's dancing Santa sings Jingle Bell Rocks.

Fox Celebrity Boxing is feature Ed Bradly vs. Mr. Ed. 

Summer in the City by The Loving Spoonfuls plays during the riot.

When the looters break into Music World they come out playing the Notre Dame fight song.

Arnie Pye makes an appearance. He hasn't had a speaking part on the show since the episode Children Of A Lesser Clod in May of 2001.

Otto goes down the street carrying Picasso's Guernica.

A guy is selling I Survived The Springfield Riot t-shirts but is crushed by the statue of Jebedia

Homer traces Jimbo's hat to the Wooly Bully shop. (the name is based on the 1964 song) He does a Dragnet interrogation of the sales clerk.

Homer's security company number is 636-555-3472

When Moe hears Homer is the new police chief he pulls a lever and accidentally exposes all the gambling equipment. Complete with a sign that says "Tonight In Moe's Attic Paul Anka!"

Homer frees Otis, the loveable town drunk, this is a spoof on the Andy Griffith Show character.

Homer trying to recruit help at church is based on the 1952 movie High Noon.

The mobsters driving to shoot Homer is a spoof on the opening credits of The Sopranos with various Springfield locations in the background and the theme song Woke Up This Morning.

The population of Springfield is 30,720 and its elevation is 1582'.

Billboard: Superintendent Chalmers, Now More Than Ever

Originally this episode was planned to air as the first of the 14th season but a last minute decision had it air on a Wednesday night at the end of the 13th season. Only 21 seasons to go, so far. Will there be a 35th season? I guess we'll find out in the fall.

Treehouse Of Horror XIII

This episode premiered on November 3rd, 2002. The lead in show was a repeat of the Simpsons (I Am Furious Yellow) and was followed by King Of The Hill. It ran opposite The W.W.O. Disney (Home Alone 4), Becker and American Dreams.

The show starts off with a seance in order for Ned to contact Maude. Bart shows up wearing a dress and a mop but the real ghost shows up and starts reading from The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror 13. (this is the first episode not titled The Simpsons Halloween Special)

Send In The Clones

The title of this segment is based on the 1973 song Send In The Clowns

Homer's hammock collapses just as the hammock salesman is passing by. The new hammock turns out to be cursed and creates a clone of Homer, he makes Homer 2 do all the work however the clone kills himself with faulting wiring, so Homer create a second clone to help him toss the dead one over the fence. He creates even more clones to take care care of all his boring chores like going clothes shopping with Marge and visiting Grandpa. When Marge wants to snuggle the real Homer steps in. Homer tells one of the clones to return Ned's chainsaw however he cuts Flander's head off. Homer dumps the clones off in a field, but first he kills all the ones who know how to get home. However he also leave the hammock with the clones, and they start mass creating new Homers. The Homers go on a rampage, eating all the crops and draining the Duff brewery. Lisa comes up with a plan to lure the Homers into the Springfield Gorge with giant donuts. After the attack Marge discovers that the real Homer fell off the cliff and has been replaced by a clone. 

Marge's list of chores for Homer: 1) Change Floodlights 2) Clean Downspouts 3) Write Wedding Thank You Notes 4) Mow Lawn

When they show the Homer clones it also includes Peter Griffith (a spoof on the comment that Family Guy is just a clone of The Simpsons) and the original Tracey Ullman shorts version, "Lets all go out for frosty chocolate milkshakes". There is also a Homer wearing Kissinger's glasses from the episode $pringfield, a fat Homer from King-Sized Homer and a faceless Homer.

The Homer clone story comes from the 1996 movie Multiplicity

Gil is the farmer of the corn crop destroyed by the Homer clones, they also eat him.

When the military are talking about the Homer swarm they do it in the War Room from the 1964 film Dr. Strangelove.

During the giant donuts scene they play Ride of the Valkyries by Wagner in a spoof of the 1979 film Apocalypse Now

The Homers falling into the gorge is a spoof on when Homer fell in Springfield Gorge in the episode Bart The Daredevil.

The segment ends with the 1970 song The One You're With by Stephen Stills

The Fright To Creep And Scare Harms

The title of this segment is based on the Second Amendment "The Right To Keep And Bear Arms"

Bart and Lisa are burying Goldie the goldfish (August-October). They find Billy the Kid's tombstone, it is inscribed "I dream of a world without guns. Everyone turns in their guns for money, which are converted into playground equipment. Once the guns are gone a zombie Billy The Kid shows up with the James brothers, Sundance Kid and Kiser Wilhelm. They cause mass destruction around town. Professor Frink has built a time machine but Homer takes off with it to stop Lisa. He leads a heavily armed crowd to shoot up the graves. The zombies are run out of town but another future Homer shows up to warn them about an Earth ravaged by gun violence, however Moe shoots him and takes off with the time machine to find caveman hookers. 

Protest rally banner: Remember William Bonney Ban Guns Now. Signs at the protest: Conceal Love, Not Firearms / Let's Murder Gun Violence / Fire Gil, Not Guns

Moe writes a books "My Troubled Mind"

Note, the really Billy the Kid is buried in Ft. Sumner New Mexico

The Island Of Dr. Hibbert

The title and plot line of this segment is based on the H.G. Wells story The Island Of Dr. Moreau.

The family is flying to the Island Of Lost Souls. Dr. Hibbert runs the island resort, he has a monkey Willie and serves Professor Frink for dinner as a turkey. Hibbert grabs Marge and converts her into a panther woman. Flanders shows up as a half cow who needs to be milked, he gets Homer to do it. Ned takes him to where the hybrids are living. Bart has been turned into a spider and writes "Eat My Shorts" in his web. Homer tells the hybrids that all they can do is sleep and mate and roll around in their own filth and mate, then asks where he can sign up. He is turned into a walrus. Kodos and Kang fly over the skull shaped island and claim it's like their number 4. 

Hibbert's half animals: Krabappal cheetah / Jasper Goat / Selma Elephant / Patty Lion / Snake Skunk / Krusty Lion / Apu Opossum / Lou Leopard / Eddy Mouse / Zit Faced Kid Donkey / Lovejoy Kangaroo / Ralph Peacock / Comic Book Guy Ram / Grandpa Chicken / Otto Camel / Moleman Turtle / Moe Frog / Cletus Monkey / Barney Panda / Sideshow Mel Aardvark (I guess) / Chalmers (I can't tell) / Wiggum Pig (hmmmm) / Smithers Flamingo / Disco Stu Shrew / Luigi Guinea Pig / Bart Spider / Maggie Aardvark / Lisa Hawk / Sea Captain Aligator / Dr Nick Squirrel / Judge Hippo /Mr. Burns Fox / Bumblebee Man Bee / Kent Brockman Rhino / Martin Sheep / Skinner and Agnes Kangaroos / Nelson Rat

During the animal pool scene the theme from Fantasy Island plays. 

How I Spent My Strummer Vacation

This episode premiered on November 10th 2002. The lead in show was a repeat of The Simpsons (Weekend at Burnses) and followed by King Of The Hill. It ran opposite The W.W.O. Disney (Beauty And The Beast), 60 Minutes and American Dreams. 

The couch gag is the family comes in on water skis and jumps sharks to get onto the couch, however the sharks get Homer's legs.

Homer goes to Moe's but discovers he doesn't have any money. He goes to the top of a mountain for thin air, licks toads at the pet store and donates blood. He goes back to the bar to mock Moe, who gives him a free beer. Homer staggers out the door and gets in his car but he threw his keys down the sewer, he tries to escape making car noises but they stuff him into a cab. He wakes up at 5 in the afternoon and can't remember anything. That night the family watches Taxicab Conversations, Homer is one of the passengers, at first he's really complimentary and then he starts talking about how he had to give up his dreams of being a rock star. The family is mad at Homer for saying he ruined their lives, the next day they meet him at work and go on a sinister trip, they dump him off in the woods but it's The Rolling Stones Rock And Roll Fantasy Camp. Homer took some pills and can't stop talking and sees Jesus. Elvis Costello tries to talk some of the campers into playing the base. Homer comes up with his own guitar move, swinging it by the cord, but he loses it and it crashes through Mick Jagger's window,"SIMPSON!" When Kieth Richards tries to teach the campers how to escape to the limo the guys stop to make out with the cardboard groupies. The campers put on a show and then the family comes to take Homer home. He wants to stay but the camp is over. Mick Jagger lets Homer do a guest shot on the stage at a charity concert. When he shows up it turns out they just want him to test the mics as a roadie. Homer decides to start singing but Jagger drives the devil car on stage and chases him around, however he loses control and crashes into the audience, causing a riot. Homer realizes that he'd rather be at home than a rock star. To thank him they give Homer the devil car. He shoots flames at Skinner and burns his suit off. Cut to Richards and Jagger doing housework. The Closing credits are shown over live shots of the rock stars recording their lines. 

Elvis Costello, Tom Petty, Keith Richards, Mick Jagger, Lenny Kravitz and Brian Setzer do their own voices in this episode.

The couch gag is a reference to the term "Jumping the shark" It refers to a show that has peaked and is on a downhill run. The expression came from the Happy Days episode where Fonzie jumps a shark on water skis. This is also a Self Aware joke however we're heading into season 35 so....

Notes in Homer's wallet: Had to buy diapers for Maggie, love Marge...Simpson / Took money for the school book fair, Love Lisa / Homer, I need cash or they're gonna break my legs, Bart

Homer wears a pin that says "Be nice to me: I gave blood" so Carl doesn't punch him. 

Homer's favorite show is MTC: Monkey Trauma Center

Taxicab Conversations is based on Taxicab Confessions. Disco Stu admits that he hates Disco. 

Regulars at the fantasy camp: Homer / Otto / Barney / Apu / Wiggum / Herman / Kirk / Hibbert / Frink / Gil / Lenny

Elvis Costello's Instrument Shack / Lenny Kravitz Thread Shed / Intro To Guitar Slinging With Brian Setzer / Lyrics Workshop with Tom Petty / Escaping To The Limo Prof. Keith Richards 

Bart vs. Lisa vs. The Third Grade

This episode premiered on November 17th 2002. It ran in its usual time slot (the repeat episode was Gump Roast). It ran opposite The W.W.O. Disney (Mr. St. Nick), Becker and American Dream

The chalkboard gag is "Fish Do Not Like Coffee" and the couch gag is Homer going through a series of Get Smart doors, including the phone booth, until he drops onto the couch where the rest of the family is already sitting.

The family is watching TV but the only thing on is reality shows. Bart suggests getting a satellite dish, in order to pay for it Homer bets heavily on a horse named "No Risk". The guy tells Homer they'll install the dish sometime between 8 AM Monday and June, cut to September when they are actually doing the work. Bart becomes addicted to TV and doesn't study for the aptitude test. The kids have to go to a performance by MC Safety and the Caution Crew, a group of rappers talking about cross walks. At the assembly Skinner announces that Lisa is being promoted to the third grade, and that Bart is being demoted, to the third grade. The siblings are going to be in the same class, Homer is watching on satellite TV but changes the channel to Mannix. Bart excels since he took the class the year before. Bart and Lisa end up as field trip buddies. The kids teach the other students the game of Punch Buggy, just as they drive by a Volkswagen dealership. At the capitol the legislators are debating changing the flag from the sun setting on the Confederate Flag so the teacher gives the students an assignment, make a new flag. Bart changes Lisa's flag to say Learn To Fart. Bart and Lisa get into a fight and miss the bus, they are left behind in Capitol City and get lost in the woods. The school adds Bart and Lisa's names to the memorial wall. Bart confesses to all the things he's done to Lisa. The kids are found by a group of hillbillies, who drive them back to town. Skinner decides to return Bart to the fourth grade and Lisa decides to go back to the second grade. The episode ends with Millhouse saying "Ay Caramba" and Skinner calling him sad. 

The couch gag is a spoof on the opening credits of the 1965 TV series Get Smart.

The family is watching Animal Survivor. A group of animals are appearing on a Survivor style show. Homer changes the channel to Touch The Stove, a competition show where people....touch the hot stove.

Marge says "get back honkey cat", a line from the Elton John song Honkey Cat.

The name of the satellite TV store is The Boob Tubery.

When Bart turns the satellite tv on for the first time The Blue Danube Waltz by Strauss plays. The satellite is full of monkeys working a switch board. I wonder how many Century Kids know what a switch board is?

The Simpsons watch the NBC news feed with Tom Brokaw. In the day people would watch for what happened during the commercial breaks when the cameras were still rolling in the studio. They then watch Japanese Friends, The Clock Channel and Robot Rumble. 

Bart pictures his class as TV shows including Bender from Futurama.

Mannix was a detective show that ran from 1967 to 1975.

When they're lost in the woods Bart says they can circle around like the kids in the Blair Witch Project, the 1999 "found footage" movie.

The teacher of the third grade is Mrs. McConnell

Lisa reads Love In The Time Of Coloring Books, a spoof on Love In The Time Of Cholera. (I thought they made up the title of that book for the movie Serendipity)

The Capitol City Goofball is the state representative. 

the kids stay at the Second Best Western Hotel. 

Mary Bailey is the state governor. She was elected in the episode Two Cars In Every Garage and Three Eyes On Every Fish.

The hillbilly family is going to town to pick up the latest edition of Spy Magazine. It was published from 1986 to 1998, the hillbillies are four years too late.

This was a miss episode for me. Again, they set up a story line but then lost control of it and didn't have a real conclusion. 

Large Marge

This episode premiered on November 24th 2002. The lead in show was King Of The Hill and it was followed by That 70's Show. It ran opposite The W.W.O. Disney (The Santa Clause), Becker and The NBC Sunday Night Movie (Runaway Bride).

The title of this episode comes from the truck driving ghost character in the 1985 film Pee Wee's Big Adventure.

The couch gag is Homer drawing the family with an Etch-A-Sketch. He shouts Woo Hoo! when he's done.

The show starts off with a documentary about the 1948 Presidential Election. Homer is cheering for Dewey but is upset when Truman wins, he bet Lisa on the outcome and she gets to pick the day's activity. She chooses building homes for the homeless. Homer tries to imitate Bart's El Barto and paints El Homo, when he realizes what he did he quickly tries to paint over it, slopping paint everywhere and that's when Lisa discovers he lost his wedding band and has been wearing a bandaid wrapped in tinfoil. Two women show up and see that Homer has a tan line around where his wedding ring use to be and swarm on him. Marge listens to Radio Disney and they do a version of Who Let The Dogs Out but substitute Milk in the song. Marge thinks Homer is flexing for the women but is demonstrating how Bart was born. Marge gets jealous. Bart and Milhouse watch Batman, Krusty appears as Clownface. The villain spins Batman at high speed on a merry go round, they escape because Batman had Carousel Reversal Spray. Marge is worried that Homer is cheating on her and asks Manjla for advice, since Apu had cheated on her. Manjula points. out that Marge is flabby so she goes to a stomach stapling clinic. They make a mixup and give Marge a breast implant, but they can't remove them for 48 hours. Bart ties Milhouse to the playground merry go round and ties a rope to the back of the bus, it spins out of control and goes flying off, over the slide and just as a group of Iwo Jima veterans are visiting. The merry go round crashes over the flag and Milhouse pukes on it. Bart blames it on seeing the Batman show with Krusty. Marge has trouble adjusting to her new breasts, she decides to hide it from the family. Homer discovers Marge's enhancement and the "snuggle", then he suggest going out to dinner. They go to Luigi's and he is turning people away until he sees Marge's breasts. Lisa complains so Homer sings a song, to the tune used in The Spring In Springfield. KieKie Highsmilth from a modeling agency approaches Marge. Her first show is an oven mitt convention. Krusty is forced to change his show to promote safety. Bart plans to help Krusty out, Milhouse suggest cutting off his foot for sympathy and Bart says it didn't help his dad get his mom back. Marge comes in with back problems thanks to her implants. Bart goes to the Friars Club to tell Krusty his plan, to cause a riot at the shoe expo. Barts plan is to have Stampy the elephant try to crush Milhouse when Krusty will run up and say the safety word, Magumbo, which makes the elephant lay down. Krusty forgets the word and Stampy tries to eat Milhouse and Bart, and then goes nuts. The police are about to shoot Stampy when Marge runs up and flashes the police, Krusty comments on Marge's breasts by saying Magumbos and the elephant lays down and spits out Milhouse, Bart and Homer. Marge gets the implants removed. 

Adam West does the voice of Batman, Burt Ward does Robin and the Baha Men do their own voices.

Simpsons Prediction: Homer watches a film about Truman winning the 1948 election, he says "not if I can stop that inauguration". In 2021 the maga crowd tried to stop the vote certification. 

Domiciles for the Destitute. Carter, Bush sr. and Clinton are building homes, it turns into a Three Stooges bit.

Lindsay Nagel and Cookie Kwan are the two women "husband shopping" at the charity build. 

Here's something that hasn't happened for a while, they pan down from the second to the first floor and there are dinosaur eggs hatching in the space between. Velociraptors to be specific.

Kent Brockman is doing a report on the Segway scooter and the loss of 1000 lives. Ironically the owner of Segway Inc died in 2010 when he rode one over a cliff.

In the episode Radioactive Man Krusty had tried out for the part of Krispie The Clown in the 1960's tv show.

Protests signs at Krusty's soundstage: Parents United Against Krusty's Evil (PUKE) / Don't Barf On Me (with the don't tread on me snake puking) / Cancel Beavis & Butthead, Jackass, Krusty.

Restaurant patrons that sing about Marge's breasts: Homer / Moe / Snake / Dr. Hibbert / Sea Captain / Mr. Burns / Quimby / Marge Powers / Jasper / Agnes / Skinner / Gladys / Wiggum / Sideshow Mel / Bumblebee Man / Old Jewish Guy / Dr. Nick

Bart sings "I got Krusty in hot water" to the tune of Yankee Doodle. 

Marge's first job is at the Oven Mitt Convention "If the mitt don't fit, we will remit" (This slogan is based on Johnnie Cochran's closing arguments in the OJ Simpson trial)

Marge appears on the cover of Trade Show Digest. Magazine headline "Margerum Wows Dog Chow Pow-Wow"

Marge won Presenter Of The Month at the mitt show.

Shoe expo booths: Fat Tony's Cement Shoes, the last shoes you'll ever need. / Shoes For Jesus (run by Ned) / Drederick Tatum Footwear / Stampy Says: Don't Forget Shoelaces (Stampy is from the episode Bart Gets An Elephant) / Global Shoehorn

Springfield Shopper headline: Crazed Mom Goes Topless Photos Pages 3-28 / TV Clown Saves Day.

The Baha Men sing a closing credit song of Who Let The Jugs Out?

We've reached episode 295, five more and we hit another century mark and almost to the end of 2002. That means only 22 more years worth of shows to go. 

 The Simpsons 286-290

Gump Roast

This episode premiered on April 21st 2002. The lead in show was King Of The Hill and it was followed by Malcolm In The Middle. It ran opposite the 14th Annual World Music Awards, Max Bickford and Weakest Link.

The title comes from the 1994 movie Forrest Gump.

The couch gag is a repeat of the slot machine.

The show starts off with Homer sitting on a park bench in front of city hall with a box of chocolates, Wiggum warns him there is a law against imitating movie characters. Moe shows up as Austin Powers and gets arrested. Inside the police wagon is Dr. Hibbert dressed as Darth Vader. Homer starts telling Wiggum about his life and they do a series of flashbacks to previous episodes. The family shows up and they take Homer to the Friars Club for a roast, more clips. Agnes Skinner shows up in a dress similar to what Jennifer Lopez wore to the Grammys in 2000. Flanders and Lovejoy do a Smother's Brothers bit. Kang and Kodos show up to judge humanity based upon Homer's memories, more clips. Kang and Kodos promise to not destroy the world in exchange for going to the People's Choice Awards. There a montage of Simpsons scenes with special lyrics to the tune of We Didn't Start The Fire. The episode ends with the lyrics "have no fears we've got stories for years". Considering there was another 22 years worth of episodes after this they weren't kidding. 

Future episodes: Marge becomes a robot / Moe gets a cellular phone / Bart gets a pet bear / Patty, Selma and Grandpa Abe get married.

I Am Furious (Yellow)

This episode premiered on April 28th, 2002. It ran in its usual time slot and opposite The ABC Big Picture Show (The Sixth Sense), Everybody Loves Raymond and Weakest Link.

The title comes from the 1967 movie I Am Curious (Yellow)

There is no chalkboard gag and the couch gag is a repeat of the claw machine.

The school is holding Career Day. Kirk shows up, he's introduced as "Bart's friend's father", he's working as the assistant to the guy who puts fliers under car wipers. Milhouse tells him that Luann is getting remarried. Skinner complains about the quality of speakers so Lisa suggests going to the Springfield Speakers Bureau. She gets them to hire Geoff Jenkins, creator of Danger Dog. Jenkins tells the kids that he goofed off in school and spends most of his time eating candy. Bart tries to sell his comic Danger Dude to Comic Book Guy. CBG mocks Bart but just then Stan Lee shows up. Lee says Bart's comic is stinky but tells him to find his own voice. Bart gets inspired by Homer and creates Angry Dad. All the kids at school love Bart's comic book and CBG ads him to the rack. Stan Lee tries to convince Database to buy an action figure of The Thing and breaks his Batmobile. An internet company buys Bart's Angry Dad to turn it into an internet cartoon, they pay Bart in stock which is on a toilet paper roll. The internet company's most popular show is bin Laden in a blender.  Homer sees Angry Dad and realizes that it's about him, he rushes home to confront Bart but a mob rocks his car to make him angry in real life. Homer realizes he has a rage problem and vows to stop being angry. While trying to meditate Homer almost drowns in the bath tub. When he tries to suppress his rage a boil pops out on his neck, he pushes it back in. Bart goes to the internet company and finds that they went bust and their stock is worthless, however he had set a trap to make Homer angry in order to get more material for his comic, now he has to get home and take it down. Homer comes home and sees a sign for free donuts in the treehouse, however there is a rug over a hole, he falls through and gets caught on a zip line that carries him through cactus and used diapers. When he cuts the rope he falls into green paint, tears his clothes and goes on a Hulk rampage. Stan Lee says Homer can't be the Hulk because he is and tries to change, claiming he's done it before. At the hospital Hibbert tells Bart that setting off Homer's rage saved his life. Bart and Homer go fishing where Bart keeps insulting Homer. 

Stan Lee does his own voice in this episode, 6 years before Iron Man and the launch of the MCU.

Members of the Speakers Bureau: Walter Mondale / Marvin Hamlisch / Mark Fuhrman / Former president of Proctor and Gamble. The special of the month is Mr. Blackwell debating Mr. T.

Martin asks Jenkins what state Danger Dog lives in and the answer is Michigan. This is part of the long running joke about what state do the Simpsons live in.

Continuity error, Ralph is seen in the same class with Bart and Milhouse even though he's in the second grade. 

When Dinosaurs Get Drunk is cancelled and replaced with The Boring World Of Niels Bohr. 

The internet company is BetterThanTV.com

In 2002 bin Laden was still alive and the most wanted man by the U.S. military. This was also pre Bush's invasion of Iraq. Seal Team 6 would kill bin Laden in 2011.

This has been a Bart-Tune Presentation in associating with Aye Caramba Entertainment.

When Homer gets caught attacking Bart he says he's just rehearsing for the movie. This was 5 years before The Simpsons Movie.

Homer takes Churchill Downers Horse Tranquilizers. 

While trying to take a calming walk Homer is hit with the newspaper, a milk bottle and a piano.

Self aware joke: when Bart runs out of material for Angry Dad he says "don't make me do a clip show"

When Stan Lee says he's the Hulk CBG says "Oh please, you couldn't even change into Bill Bixby" This is a reference to the 1977 TV series The Incredible Hulk.

The internet company going bankrupt is a reference to the Dot Com bubble burst of 2000, however it was also a prediction about YouTube that would start in 2005 and Netflix that would launch in 2007.

The Sweetest Apu

This episode premiered on May 5th, 2002. It ran in its usual time slot and opposite the ABC Big Picture Show (Stewart Little), Touched By An Angel and The NBC 75th Anniversary Special.

The title comes from the 1981 song The Sweetest Thing (I've ever known) by Juice Newton

The chalkboard gag is "I will never lie about being cancelled again" and the couch gag is a repeat of the repo men.

Apu's kids are running crazy at the Kwik-E-Mart, he wants Majula to take them home. Homer and Bart come in wearing Civil War uniforms for their reenactments. Barney is playing General Grant, Homer tells him he has to drink, he chugs a beer but nothing happens. The battle is fought between the North, the South and the East (who want to remain near the Union and wear plaid uniforms). Meanwhile Tom Brokaw is speaking to the veterans of WWII, they hear the mock battle and attack in their tanks. Just as the South is surrendering the tanks show up and help the South, and Frink shows up with his steam powered super spider. Homer has trashed the beer keg he got at the Kwik-E-Mart, he's written on the side "This keg had dents-Apoo". Homer hears giggling and discovers Apu and the Squishy Lady fooling around in the back room, he backs out of the store and all the way home, however he dreams about what he saw. Marge figures out Homer's secret from the way his eyeball is rolling around. Homer and Marge play badminton with Apu and Manjula and keep making double entendras about being unfaithful. Marge and Homer figure out they should talk to someone so they go to see Krusty, he says "all those kids". Homer tells Apu he saw him cheating on his wife, Marge says Apu has to break it off with the Squishy Lady, however they keep fooling around. Manjula looks at the surveillance video from the store and sees Apu cheating and kicks him out. Kirk is Apu's new next-door neighbor at the divorced dads apartment complex. Marge invites Manjula and Apu over for dinner to trick them to get back together. The kids play Ganesh to order them to get back together however Lisa and Bart get into a fight over what he is saying. Manjula serves Apu with divorce papers. Manjula considers letting Apu come back, Marge suggests making a list of demands. Apu decides to hang himself (dark turn there). After breaking up with the Squishee woman Apu starts selling Smooshies, the kids hate them. Apu and Manjula get back together, Homer spies on them from a ladder and when they start to fool around he hops it backwards toward home in a repeat of the joke from earlier.

James Lipton does his own voice

The chalkboard gag is a reference to Matt Groening taking about Season 13 being the last one. Interestingly enough Disney + skips this one and goes straight to the couch gag. 

A rather twisted joke, in order to signal the start of the Civil War reenactment an actor dressed up like Lincoln holds a gun to his own head and pulls the trigger. (Don't do this kids)

Barney plays Grant / Disco Stu plays Stonewall Jackson, with rollerblades

Frink's super spider is a spoof on the 1999 movie The Wild Wild West.

Homer asking the band at Apu's wedding to play the Italian song is a spoof on the Tahoe party scene from Godfather II. 

Springfield Bachelor Apts. Our Beds Are The Murphiest.

Rainer Wolfcastle appears on The Actor's Studio. He plays McBain and shoots James Lipton.

Marge asks Homer if he's thinking what she's thinking, he's thinking of hunting people with a laser pistol from a glider.

Apu's reincarnation list Tiger / Snake / Alfred E. Newman / Goat with a hat / Apu / Tapeworm / Assistant to Loren Michaels. 

Manjula's list: Break Up With Squishee Girl / Lose Weight / Get cartoon published in the New Yorker / change name to Slime Q. Slimedog / Wear name tag with new name / Fix Carburetor / Eat Lightbulb / perform My Fair Lady with all-octuplet cast

When Apu gets his cartoon published in the New Yorker Homer says he bought the issue for Rickard Avedon's pictures of Lenny.

This was a so-so episode. The jokes were meh, and Homer backing up went on for too long. Apu and Manjela aren't interesting enough characters to carry an entire episode by themselves and it was another "our marriage is in trouble" storyline (although it wasn't about Homer and Marge for once). Overall not one of the better ones, definitely of the time. 

The Little Girl In The Big Ten

This episode premiered on may 12th 2002. It ran in its usual time slot and opposite Dinotopia (a miniseries), Max Bickford and Weakest Link

The title of this episode is based on the 1925 movie A Little Girl In A Big City and the Big Ten college league

The couch gag is a repeat of the zit faced teen making out with his girlfriend.

The second grade gym class is ready to get started however Milhouse has his head stuck in the rings and Willie is cutting him down. Lisa tries to do the pummel horse but is bounced back by the spring board and knocks the rest of the class down. To keep her from failing gym and bringing the entire 2nd grade down Skinner has Lisa go to a private gym. At Lugash's gym Lisa trips over a ball and sees a vision of Kennedy. He tells her that she has to get up and do her best. Grandpa takes Bart to Krusty Burger where he gets stung by a Chinese mosquito that got trapped in his Krusty kids meal toy. Thanks to her big head Lisa has perfect balance. Lisa thinks the other girls in gym class are the same age as her but they turn out to be college students, they think she's as old as them and take to to school. When they take Lisa home Homer is dancing and throws a keg through the front window, they think she lives in a party house. They invite her to go to a poetry reading by Robert Pinsky. Bart is diagnosed with Panda Virus and has to be quarantined in a giant hamster ball. When Homer says goodnight to the kids Bart is in his bubble, Lisa snuck out to a poetry reading and Maggie is fighting off a raccoon. Lisa realizes she didn't finish her social studies project. The next day she falls asleep in class and gets an A Minus. Bart saves the nerds from the bullies with his bubble. When Lisa sneaks away from school Milhouse, Martin and Database follow her to the university. They interrupt a class about the deeper meaning of an Itchy and Scratchy cartoon when the professor shuts it off halfway though. Milhouse exposes Lisa as being 8, she leaves in tears. Homer is upset that Lisa earned 16 college credits. Back in school Lisa is snubbed by the rest of the students for being too smart. Bart gets stuck in the tree so Lisa uses her gymnastics to climb up with him. She is depressed that she's shunned so Bart comes up with a plan. In recognition of his 20 years of service the school names the parking annex after Skinner. Seymour wears a white suit to the dedication, Lisa rolls off the roof in Bart's bubble crashing into a chocolate cake and splatter Skinner. The crowd chants her name and carries her off, meanwhile Bart has a panic attack at being outside again and jumps into a vent, but it's an intake and he gets sucked down into the building. 

Robert Pinsky does his own voice. He reads Impossible To Tell. 

Lisa's Bully, Francine, is seen in the gym class. She was introduced in the episode Bye Bye Nerdie. Phoebe is also in the class, she was in the episode Lard Of The Dance

The gym coach's name is Brunella.

Lugash's Gym: I make you star. I am Lugash. Coach Lugash was first seen in the episode Children Of A Lesser Clod.

Grandpa gets a Krusty Burger Nostalgia meal, ration stamps and a shell full of oleo along with a Liberace action figure. 

Krustyco Sweatshop "Today: Force Your Daughter To Work Day" There are a few culturally insensitive jokes here. The sweatshop is next to The Great Wall Of China.

Homer is singing Tubthumping by Chumbawamba but making up his own lyrics as he goes along.

Dated reference: One of the college students complains that her dorm doesn't have a DSL line. Today everybody works off wifi. 

Bart having to live in a bubble is based on the 1976 made for TV movie The Boy In The Plastic Bubble and the 2001 movie Bubble Boy.

Cafe Kafka (with a coffee drinking insect on the sign) Now With: Hegel's Bagels (a German philosopher) At the cafe the roady tests the mic by repeating "April is the cruelest month" from the poem The Waste Land by T.S. Eliot.

When Lisa sneaks away from school the Pink Panther Theme plays. 

In Anthro 101: Passive Analysis Of Visual Iconography. They watch Itchy and Scratchy, Butter Off Dead, episode DABF06 (in The Simpsons this was the production code for the episode The Bart Wants What It Wants). An Amish Itchy is eating pancakes but is out of butter, so he feeds Scratchy to his cow, we see him being digested in the four stomachs and then Itchy milks the cow and churns butter. The butter label says "I Can't Believe It's Not Scratchy!" Scratchy's eyeballs are still on the spread. Itchy says a quick prayer and eats. 

While following Lisa Database says he feels like Harriet The Spy, the 1996 movie.

Moleman is pretending to be a freshman so he can sit in classrooms.

Marge puts Cathy cartoons on the fridge to make the kitchen more intelligent. Homer thought it was about a guy. 

The plaque honoring Skinner read "Seymour Skinner 1953-2010. He's upset that they guessed at his death date. It was 8 years in the future then but 14 years in the past now.

When Bart is pulling his prank Thus Spake Zarathustra plays (it's best known as the theme to 2001: A Space Odyssey)

The Frying Game

This episode premiered on May 19th 2002, The lead in show was a repeat of The Simpsons (Brawl In The Family) and followed by The X-Files. It ran opposite The W.W.O. Disney (Dinosaur), 60 Minutes and The NBA Easter Conference Final (Nets 104 - Celtics 97)

The title of this episode came from the 1992 movie The Crying Game

There is no chalkboard gag and the couch gag is a repeat of the silent movie characters.

Lenny and Carl are arguing which is better, Muhammad Ali or anti-lock breaks. Homer comes in and says he ordered Marge a koi pond for their anniversary. Marge and Lisa are meditating by the pond until a caterpillar shows up and starts screaming. Homer wants to squish it but the EPA shows up and stops him since it's an endangered species. Homer is ordered to protect the caterpillar however he smashes it with a book. Homers evil side kills his good side and he buries the caterpillar. The EPA shows up but it's still alive, since he almost killed the bug Homer is sentenced to 200 hours of community service, he has to deliver Meals On Wheels. He goes to a creepy house where he meets an old lady with an ax, however she turns out to be a nice person. She starts calling Homer to do favors for him, he asks Burns to cover for him. He soon gets tired of helping her out so Marge goes to talk to her and gets tricked into helping out. Pretty soon they are dressed up as the butler and maid. A burglar with braces stabs Sternhagen (the old lady) and steals her diamond necklace, she changed her will leaving Homer and Marge $50,000 so they come under suspicion. Moe is afraid of Homer so he starts treating him better. At church nobody wants to sit near the Simpsons, Homer gets Lovejoy to cut his sermon short. Otto drives the Springfield Death Tour by the Simpson's house, Homer gets a ride home with them. The cops search the house and finds the stolen necklace in Maggie's room, Homer and Marge are arrested. The kids are sent to live with Cletus. At the trial Homer and Marge are found guilty and sentenced to death. On death row Lovejoy gets into a fight with a Catholic Priest. Homer wants to "snuggle" through the bars. Homer decides to save Marge by confessing. Homer is strapped in, the phone rings and it's the governor, however he just wants to know if Homer is a twitcher. They throw the switch however the chamber is pulled away and it turns out to be a TV show Frame Up. The burglar with the braces is the host of the show and Mrs. Bellamy turns out to be Carmen Electra in disguise. Homer tells off Carmen Electra while staring at her chest. The end.

Carmen Electra does her own voice. Frances Sternhagen does the voice of Mrs. Bellamy.

Homer gives marriage advice to Lenny and Carl. In the episode Secrets of a Successful Marriage Homer taught a class about a happy marriage until Marge got mad at him for gossiping in it. Homer's advice: Make every day a celebration of your love / Surprise her with a pasta salad / Put a mini beret on your wang.

Pamphlet: Screamapillar Care Tips.

Sternhagen says that talking to Homer is like talking to Bennett Cerf, the founder of Random House publishing. 

First Church Of Springfield sign: If you were a pastor, you'd be home now!

Springfield Shopper headline: Ho. J. Simpson Trial Starts Today. (it's back to costing 50¢)

Gil is the Simpson's lawyer. 

During the trial Gil is reading How To Earn Big Money Doing TV Repair. 

Springfield Penitentiary "Not Affiliated With Death Row Records" Death Row Records is an independent label founded in 1991. It has gone through a number of owners, including a division of Hasbro. Currently Snoop Dogg owns the label and is trying to revive it.

Homer's last meal: pork chops / pizza / chicken / donuts / burgers / hot dogs / pie and a keg of beer. He plans to "go off" when they execute him.

As Homer is being led to the electric chair the warden announces "dead man walking on the green mile". This is a spoof on the Steven King book The Green Mile and the 1998 movie of the same name. John Coffey is on death row but he's a psycho killer who tries to strangle Homer and threatens to kill Mr. Jingles.

The regulars waiting for Homer's execution: Dr. Hibbert / Ned / Marge / Agnes/ Mrs. Krabappal / Moe / Skinner / Lenny / Patty / Selma / Abe (asleep) / Apu / The Screaming Caterpillar (from earlier in the episode) / Manjula / George Bush sr. 

Fox shows Frame Up / No Pants Island / Fart Date

Eddy and Lou get producer credits on the show but don't have last names.

This was another episode that started off with one story and then abandon it for a second story, which didn't really have an ending. I don't know if I saw this one but I wasn't surprised by how it turned out considering they've done this before in The Great Money Caper, Thirty Minutes Over Tokyo and Missionary Impossible. I find it kind of annoying that they go through the whole story and then it's just an elaborate set up. I hope the show has hit it's low point and gets better from here.

Meanwhile, I've reached the end of another 5 episode. There is only one more to go in the 13th season and I'm hoping for a better final episode than the rest of the season. And to think Matt Groening, thanks to budget cuts and constant network interference in the stories, wanted to end the series 22 years ago. Yet it still goes on, and I guess so do I.

The Simpsons 281-285

The Lastest Gun In The West

This episode premiered on February 24th, 2002. The lead in show was The King Of The Hill and it was followed by Malcolm In The Middle. It ran opposite The W.W.O. Disney (Tarzan), The Education Of Max Bickford and the XIX Winter Olympics Closing Ceremonies.

The title comes from the expression The Fastest Gun In The West

The chalkboard gag is "Making Milhouse cry is not a science project" and the couch gag is the zit faced teen is making out with a girl on the Simpson's couch.

Bart is having a great day, he catches a foul ball from the Isotopes, finds several dimes and gets free ice cream, however he comes across a dog that chases him home. He tries to scare Lisa with a fake spider and gets attacked by the dog again. The dog turns out to be nice to everyone else except Bart. He eventually escapes the dog by climbing over a gate of Buck McCoy's house. Buck makes Bart do a domination trick on the dog and it goes away. Grandpa remembers Buck McCoy, Lisa tries to mention her hero but is cut off. The Simpsons invite Buck over for dinner, Bart decides it's time to relaunch the actor's career so he tries to start a cowboy trend at school. He goes to Krusty to try to get Buck on the show. Krusty agrees to let Buck perform but tries to give him stage fright, Buck shows up on camera drunk, he shoots up the studio and hits Krusty. Buck is fired and Bart gets rid of all his stuff. Marge figures the way to cheer Bart up is to get Buck to sober up. Snake is robbing a bank so Homer comes up with the idea to get Buck to stop them. Buck lassos the robber's guns and he becomes Bart's hero once again, and rides off into the sunset. Buck goes home and is seen picking up his mail and dumping his trash, and the mean dog chases Bart down the street. 

Dennis Weaver does the voice of Buck McCoy

Lisa is gossiping and says that Ralph's baby brother is really a pine cone. In the episode Wild Barts Can't Be Broken there is a drawing by Ralph of his family, complete with a baby, hanging on the wall of the school. Other people must have noticed this and commented on it thus requiring an eventual (three years later) explanation.

Bart tells the dog "Eat my short stories", a spoof on his catchphrase that he doesn't use anymore. The book he shoves in the dog's mouth is America's 2nd Best Short Stories. The shred from the destroyed book is the ending to The Lottery.

Buck's Movies: Gunfight At The Museum Of Natural History / Buck McCoy * Bob "Tex" Allen, Texas Rangers Ride Again / Wyatt Ear Meets The Mummy / Six Brides For Seven Brothers / Six-Gun Lullaby 

Buck's horse is named Frank The Wonder Horse. 

Self aware joke: Marge makes a comment that Homer won't have an adventure this week. 

Buck promote Drunken Cowboy Whiskey

Buck stared in a tv show called McTrigger, A Quinn Martin Production. This was a spoof on McCloud, a 70's show that stared Dennis Weaver. The episode is titled "Scuse me while I kill the sky" This is a spoof on the Jimmi Hendrix lyric from Purple Haze. Buck says they wrote him out of the show and it became Room 222, a high school drama that ran from 1969 to 1974 (and launched Bruno Kirby's career)

Krusty says he doesn't want to do the flavor of the month bits on his show but wants it to have a timeless quality,  then he gets a script with hanging chad and Judge Ito jokes. Hanging chads had been a deciding factor in the 2000 Presidential election and Judge Ito had oversaw the OJ Simpson trial in 1994. The joke makes more sense now since the Century Kids probably don't get them.

Sign next to Buck's costume display "In case of comeback break glass" with a hammer. 

Homer wants to become Bart's new hero and shows up with a photo of him in the classic Farrah Fawcett swimsuit. 

The John Ford Center For Alcoholic Cowboys. This is a spoof on the Betty Ford clinic and the classic westerns director John Ford.

Buck mentions Howard Hawks and David O. Selznick. Classic Hollywood figures.

This episode fell into the category of my least favorites. The jokes all seemed to fall flat, the original story about a vicious dog chasing Bart was dropped until they needed a closing joke. And the whole Buck storyline just kind of ended with no real conclusion. Normally I consider this one a skip but I'm doing them all so I had to watch it.

The Old Man And The Key

This episode premiered on March 10th 2002. It ran in its regular time slot and opposite The W.W.O. Disney (Confessions Of An Ugly Step Sister), Max Bickford and NBA Basketball (Lakers 117 - Nicks 103)

The title of the episode is based on the Ernest Hemingway novel The Old Man And The Sea

The couch gag is the Blue Man Group is playing in the living room. Homer says "What the..."

Homer is excited for the start of the XFL season however the league had folded at the end of the 2001. They get a call from the nursing home informing them that Abe is dead. When they get to the nursing home they discover that there was a mistake and Stimpson had died. Zelda moves in to the vacant room and Abe starts flirting with her, however she's impressed by Zach because he can drive and has a mini van. Grandpa lost his license when he crashed into the Orca tank. When Abe goes to see Homer about driving Lisa says they should give him a chance but Homer refuses. After Abe throws a tantrum Marge offers to help him get his license back. He takes a seniors class and then goes to see Selma at the DMV, she offers to give Abe his license if he promises to never wink at her again. After getting his license Abe dresses in his best Zoot Suit and asks to borrow Homer's car, Homer says no but Marge offers to go on a double date, they go to the drive in, Homer has a shoe on a stick to work the brake pedal from the back seat. When Granda comes home after staying out all night Homer tells him off and calls Zelda a "hoochie". Abe runs upstairs and plays Benny Goodman extra loud. Abe is allowed to drive to the store but while there he gets his lottery ticket scrapings on the leader of Los Souvenir Jackquitos (a senior gang that wears jackets from the places they have visited). When they are going to fight in the Kwik-E-Mart Apu tells them to solve their problems via a death race. They meet at the empty drainage ditch and Snake starts the race. The old Jewish guy uses Homer's shoe on a stick to cause the rival gang to crash. Their jackets catch on fire but the leader refuses to take his off, he'd rather die than not have people know what place he had visited. Abe wins the race by being the first through the tunnel however it comes out on a hill and they crash into a tree in the Simpson's back yard, Homer takes away Abe's license. Zelda has booked a trip to Branson, since Abe doesn't have a car she goes with Zach. Grandpa decides to steal Marge's car, Bart helps him hotwire it and the two head off to Missouri. Homer says they have to go after Grandpa but they don't know how they will get there, just then a bus heading to Branson rolls up in front of the house to pick up the Flanders, Homer says they should wait for the next one. They get off the bus in Bronson Missouri, where everyone looks and sounds like Charles Bronson. In Branson Abe meets Tennessee Ernie Ford, Grandpa points out that he's dead (1991) and he turns to dust. Marge wants to take a quick gambling break (because she's an addict) however there is no gambling in Branson. Homer tracks Grandpa to a show, Abe he rushes on stage to talk to Zelda, he tells her off and calls her a Hoochie. He apologizes to Homer and they head home. The Beverly Hillbilly's closing song plays over the credits while the family waves like on the classic show's closing credits. 

Olympia Dukakis does the voice of Zelda and Bill Saluga does the voice of his classic character Ray Jay Johnson. Johnson was first mentioned on the episode Krusty Gets Kancelled, and was a joke in several episodes after that.

Grandpa wears Old Old Spice

The nursing home cliques: The Preppies (wearing coon skin coats and waving '16 pendants, 1916 btw), The Comatose, The Cool Comatose (they are smoking)

Homer and Bart are playing Scrabbleship. 

Senior Education Classes Today / Must Clean Up Own Mess!

The famous meme "Old Man Yells At Cloud" is in the episode when Abe asks Patty to use it as his drivers license photo.

Abe is 5'8" and weighs 180 pounds. 

Springfield Drive In: Dude, Where's My Virginity? Starring Bridget Fonda Jr. and Judd Nelson as Dean Probationaly. This is a spoof on the 2000 movie Dude, Where's My Car?

When Abe picks up Zelda at the nursing home there are three old guys with long beards and ZZ Top's Sharp Dressed Man plays while they do the finger wave thing. 

Grandpa take a viagra and when it kicks in the theme from Popeye The Sailor Man plays, and his hair points upwards. Kind of a racy joke considering. 

Los Souvenir Jackquitos jackets: Jurassic Park / Planet Hollywood Orlando / Tasmanian Devil / Hard Rock Cafe. They drive a 57 Chevy Bel Air

The scene between Los Jackquitos and Abe's friends at the Kwik-E-Mart is a spoof on the two gangs scene in West Side Story.

The car race is a spoof on the scene from the 1978 movie Grease.

During the car race the old Jewish guy uses Homer's break shoe, The closed caption says the Los Jackquitos passenger says "The Shoe on a stick! but the actual translation is "The shoe of the devil!" The old Jewish guy yells Ich vinch eich gezunt! which the translation says means "I wish you good health!". 

On the road trip to Branson Abe and Bart listen to an old radio program of Itchy and Scratchy Radio Hour.  Itchy is at the counter of his butcher shop, Scratchy comes in and you hear him scream "You're grinding my head!" Abe says Eleanor Roosevelt was the voice of Itchy during WWII

The Itchy and Scratchy radio program is sponsored by Hansen's Mustache Wax, the wax Hitler doesn't use.

Grandpa drops a pamphlet at the Simpson's house: So You've Settled For Branson. 

Branson signs: Wilfred Brimley in "The Angina Monologues" / Andy Williams presents Glen Campbell / Glen Campbell presents Andy Williams 

Zach takes Zelda to see That's Familiar. Performers in the show: Charo / Mr. T / Bonnie Franklin / Adrian Zmed / Ray Jay Johnson / Charlie Callas / Yakov Smirnoff 

Bart went to Branson Mo. in the episode Bart On The Roads

One of the jokes of this episode is all the older actors who people thought were dead but are performing in Branson. Since it aired a number of them have actually passed away, Tennessee Ernie Ford of course (1991), Wilford Brimley (2020), Andy Williams (2012), Glen Campbell (2017), Bonnie Franklin (2013), Bill Saluga aka Ray Jay Johnson (2023) and Charlie Callas (2011) 

Tales From The Public Domain

This episode premiered on March 17th 2002. It ran in its usual time slot and opposite The W.W.O. Disney (Snow White: The Fairest Of Them All), Max Bickford and Weakest Link

The title is based on the show Tales From The Crypt.

The chalkboard gag is "Vampire is not a career choice" and the couch gag is a real life flip book of the family sitting on the couch.

Marge is flipping through the bills, one is labeled "I kill you!" written in blood. Homer gets a letter about an overdue bill from the library, he checked out Classics for Children when Bart was born but never read from it, the book is 10 years overdue. They read several of the stories.

D'oh Brother Where Art Thou?

Homer think the story is about the Odyssey van he once owned, instead it's about the end of the Trojan war and Homer's journey home. It starts with Odysseus delivering the Trojan horse to Troy. The Greeks come out of the horse and kill everyone in the city. Odysseus doesn't make a sacrifice to the gods so they send him off course. A drunken Bacchus tries to hit Odysseus with a lightning bolt but destroys Atlantis by mistake. The Sirens sing Barry Manilow's Copacabana, they turn out to be Selma and Patty. Meanwhile Bart is telling Penelope (Marge) to choose a new suitor. The ship winds up on the island of Circe and the crew is turned into pigs. Homer eats the crew. Homer has to go down the River Styx, the band sings You're My Lady. Once he makes it home Penelope asks Odysseus for tales of his adventures, he says "stop suffocating me, I'm going to Moe's"

The title of this story is based on the 2000 movie Oh Brother Where Art Thou? which is also based on Homer's Odyssey. 

Best line from this story "Now throughout history when people get wood they'll think of Trojans". I wonder how they got that past the censors. 

Barny is Bacchus (god of wine) Quimby is Zeus and the Sea Captain is Poseidon. 

Odysseus's crew: Moe, Frink, Lenny, Carl, Apu. 

Moe says "Greece is the word" as a spoof of the musical. 

The Suitors: Willie, Krusty, Kent Brockman, Skinner, Disco Stu, Kirk, Sideshow Mel, Burns.

Helen of Troy is Agnes Skinner

Hot Child In The City

Lisa is Joan Of Arc, Marge is disappointed that they aren't reading a story about Joan Van Ark (best known for playing Valene Ewing on Knott's Landing). Homer says the Hundred Years War was originally called Speedy Resolution. God tells Joan to lead the army to victory over the English. The French are trying to catapult a solider over the walls of a British castle, Joan tells them to use rocks. Milhouse is the king and when Krusty makes a joke about him he's boiled in oil. Just when Joan says she can't be defeated Willie grabs her and she's put on trial by the British. Joan calls God as her witness, Moleman comes in, and opens a trap door in the ceiling. It turns out God also told Willie to lead the British to victory. Joan is burned at the stake. Marge changes the end of the story to Joan being rescued by Sir Lancelot. 

The title of this story is based on the Nick Gilder song of the same name. 

Quimby plays the fake king but the true king is Milhouse. 

Do The Bard, Man

Homer is reading Hamlet. Bart complains that it can't be as good as anything by Stephen Bochco. Bart is Hamlet and visited by the ghost of his dead father, Homer. Hamlet makes a joke about his father being fat but Homer can't strangle him since he's a ghost. Homer was murdered by Claudius, Moe. An improv group shows up and Hamlet gets them to do the murder. Claudius accidentally confesses. Lisa shows up as Ophelia. Hamlet accidentally kills Polonius, Wiggum, who asks his son Laertes, Ralph, to avenge him by killing Hamlet. Before the duel Claudius poisons everything including Lenny and Carl, when they High Five each other they both drop dead. Claudius says Laertes gets one practice stab but he stabs himself and dies. Bart stabs Claudius but slips in his blood and dies. Marge doesn't want to clean the place up so she kills herself with a mace. Homer claims Hamlet was the inspiration for Ghostbusters, the theme song plays while the family dances. 

The title of this episode is based on the 1990 Simpsons song Do The Bart Man

Hamlet has a banner over his bed: Danes do it melancholy. And a pendant: Feudalism. 

When Homer's ghost passes through the wall he leaves slime behind, this is a spoof on Ghostbusters.

Krusty does a "You just might be a Viking" joke, this is a spoof on Jeff Foxworthy's "you might be a redneck" jokes. The viking in the front row sets the table next to him on fire and carries off the two women who were sitting there.

Blame It On Lisa

This episode premiered on March 31st 2002. The lead in show was King Of The Hill and it was followed by Greg The Bunny (A short lived sitcom about Muppet like characters and their off screen life). It ran opposite The ABC Big Picture Show (The 10 Commandments), Max Bickford and Weakest Link. 

The title of the episode is based on the 1984 movie Blame It On Rio

The couch gag is the family are marionette puppets but get tangled up, a cartoon Matt Groening throws down the strings in frustration.

Homer and Bart are watching cartoons when Marge comes in to complain about their phone bill, it seems someone made a $200 call to Brazil, Homer blames Bart and starts strangling him. Homer and Marge head to the phone company to complain about the bill, while there they see the Movie Phone Guy who is hitting  on a woman. The phone company cuts off their service, Homer gets mad when he finds out they found a box of old taco shells at the plant but nobody could call him. Homer tries to plug directly into the box but shocks himself until he falls off the pole. Lisa admits that she called Brazil, she has been sponsoring a boy in the country but he stopped writing to her so she called but he had disappeared. The family heads to Brazil. Bart learns Spanish but the country speaks Portuguese so he bashes himself in the head until he forgets it all. After visiting the orphanage the family splits up to look for Ronaldo. Homer and Bart hop in an unlicensed taxi and get kidnapped, Bart manages to escape. Homer calls Mr. Burns for the ransom money but refuses to work it off. When he calls Moe he asks Homer for money. Carnival starts and Ronaldo shows up at the Flamingo on the kids show. Ronaldo gives the Simpsons the ransom money. They do the transfer on the tram to Sugarloaf, when Homer jumps across the cable snaps and they crash down the mountain and Bart gets swallowed by an anaconda. A salsa version of the theme song plays over the closing credits. 

The Itchy And Scratchy Show: Par For The Corpse. Scratchy is teeing up a ball for Itchy but he comes up from behind and knocks Scratchy's head off. It flies into the moon's eye, Itchy throws out a couple of dollars as a caddy tip. Scratchy's head hitting the eye of the moon is based on the 1902 movie Le Voyage dans la Lune

Homer complains about the number of phone companies and how they keep changing their names. Marge says they are with Comquaaq, Bart says it's Niagular, Marge says they became Vertiqual. Meanwhile Comquaaq is changing their name to Zovuvazz. The phone company has robotic switchboard operators who look like Ernestine, Lilly Tomlin's phone operator character. (if you are a Century Kid you'll probably have to look all that up)

Lindsay Naegle is he service rep for the phone company. 

Homer reads Blue Pants Weekly.

Homer asks Bart if he's been making prank calls to Brazil. This is a reference to the episode Bart vs. Australia.

The Brazilian charity is Li'l Writeoffs. In the video Ronaldo is chased into the orphanage by a pack of angry monkeys. 

Bart says he'll have been on every continent, Lisa says "except Antarctica". Homer says "The Simpsons are going to Antarctica....next year, right now we're going to Brazil"

Lisa reads "Who wants to be a Brazilionaire? This is a spoof on the show Who Wants To Be A Millionaire that ran opposite the Simpsons on several occasions. 

The family stays at the Rio Days-Inn-Ero. This is a spoof on the hotel chain Days Inn and the 1956 Banana Boat Song.

Homer brings a book How To Loot Brazil. 

Bart watches a spoof of Xou da Xuxa, a popular Brazilian children's show with a sexy host. Later he watches Teleboobies. 

The hotel has a fruit hat similar to the one worn by Carmen Miranda, and the mini bar has a hat with Toblerone and alcohol miniature bottles. Bart sings the Chiquita Banana song.

Ronaldo lives at the Orfanato Dos Anjos Imundos (Filthy Angels Orphanage)

Homer asks the orphanage nun if she can fly. This is a reference to the 1967 sitcom The Flying Nun.

Homer and Bart go to Copacabana Beach however Homer's speedo keeps disappearing into his butt crack. 

Homer wears a shirt that says "Try And Stop Us" with an image of Uncle Sam eating the world. 

When heading to the kidnapper's hideout the theme from Miami Vice plays. 

Ronaldo tells Lisa he didn't write to tell her about becoming the Flamingo on the kids show because he didn't know what state she lived in, this is a reference to the long running joke about where the Simpsons live. It's also an in show continuity error because Lisa said she stopped getting letters from Ronaldo so he musth have been writing to her in the past. 

Ronaldo says he makes as much as Malcom In The Middle, the show that followed the Simpsons. 

Homer's kidnapping scrapbook: A toilet paper leaf / A poem about his teeth hurting after he was hit / A poem about his bleeding nose / Homer attacked by bats / being tortured with a lit cigarette.

When the ransom is paid the kidnappers comment that their money sure looks Gay. 

This episode was highly criticized by the Brazilian government for showing the country in such a poor light including poverty, crime and the kidnapping of tourists.

Weekend At Burnsie's 

This episode premiered on April 7th, 2002. It ran in its usual time slot and opposite The ABC Sunday Night Movie (October Sky), a Celine Deon special and Weakest Link

The title of the episode is based on the 1989 movie Weekend At Bernies.

The couch gag is a repeat of the hedge topiaries. 

The family is eating genetically modified vegetables for dinner, developed by Union Carbide. When the potato eats a carrot Marge decides to grow vegetables in their back yard. A flock of crows show up so she makes a scare crow. She puts up some sticks and then goes inside to get some clothes, when she comes out she finds the Flanders praying to the cross. When Homer comes home he thinks the scarecrow is someone in the yard so he attacks it and the crows thing he's their savior so they bring him beer, chips and Playdude magazine. He takes them to the Moe's but gets kicked out. The crows carry off Maggie, she's saved by her diaper turning into a parachute, Homer tells off the crows so they attack him. Dr. Hibbert tells Homer he can try medicinal marijuana to help with his pain Homer flashes back on when he got busted by a drug sniffing dog while in High School. Hibbert offers him a medicinal Wizard or Skull bong. Homer gets Lisa's music when he's stoned. Homer asks Ned the "could Jesus microwave a burrito" question and then wants Ned to read the Bible to him. He ends up signing Ned's petition to re-criminalize medicinal marijuana. Burns is about to give a speech to the stock holders and needs someone to laugh at his jokes, just then a stoned Homer wanders in, Burns promotes him to an executive vice presidency. Homer drives a Mercedes home. When Homer finds out about the criminalization bill he holds a rally however it's on the day after the election and medical marijuana lost. When the police burn all the medical marijuana a crowd shows up to breath in the smoke so Wiggum throws on the hair from the barber shop. Burns calls to make sure Homer is ready for the speech but he doesn't find him funny anymore. Homer offers Waylon a joint to laugh at Burns however they forgot Burns in the tub and he's dead. They decide to do a Weekend At Bernies and Waylon works the dead Burns as a marionette. The wires break so they close the curtain however Burns comes back to life thanks to being jostled around. Burns, Smithers and Homer do a Three Stooges face slap routine. 

The band Phish does their own voices and songs.

While making a scare crow Comic Book Guy does a version of Pop Up Videos (a VH1 program that ran from 1996 to 2002 and featured on screen facts about various music videos) Stuff in the Simpsons Pop Up Videos: Lisa's jersey from Lisa On Ice / Bart's jockey pants from Saddlesore Galactica / Jack-O-Lantern from Treehouse Of Horror III, IX, XII / Grandpa's hat from Who Shot Grandpa's Hat. If I Only Had A Brain from the 1939 movie Wizard Of Oz plays while Marge makes her scarecrow. 

Homer says he was in high school in 1978. 

Incense and Peppermints by Strawberry Alarm Clock plays when Homer tries out marijuana for the first time. Homer plays Smoke On The Water by Deep Purple. Wear Your Love Like Heaven by Donovan plays when Homer is stoned. 

Stuff in the Simpsons attic, Homer's vibrating chair, Led Zeppelin poster, Buddha, Hooks pipe, symbols playing monkey, hockey skate, Dark Side Of The Moon poster / American flag / Einstein sticking out his tongue poster / 8 track stereo / Peace sign

According to the re-criminalization petition the Sea Captain's last name is McCallister.

Protest signs: Save Medical Marijuana / Weed Us Our Rights / Keep Off The Grass (Get It?) 

Phish plays Run Like An Antelope

When they smell something being smoked in the crowd Phish refuses to play until they see a prescription for the marijuana, it turns out to be Moleman.

Line of the episode, Otto "They call them fingers but I never see them fing....oh, there they go"

Homer says marijuana can make anything funny, even that show that follows Friends. In 2002 that was Leap Of Faith. It was a sitcom that ran for 6 episodes. I had to look it up because I don't remember it. In fact its last episode aired three days before this episode of the Simpsons.

Smithers wears a suit once owned by Judy Garland, another Gay reference. 

Bill Clinton shows up at the investors meeting as the paid speaker. The "Clinton was a bad President" joke falls flat, again.

Well, another five episodes down as I edge closer to the 300 mark and closer to an eventual end, although it's hard to say when that will be.